So, they're rigging the US Open draws...

Leave it to Outside the Lines to come up with another little gem.

Today's "Rig Job of the Day" comes out of tennis. The US Open draw appears to be rigged to allow the top (at least) two seeded players.

ESPN and OTL examined the draws for the last ten years of all four major tennis tournaments.

They then tried to simulate 1,000 such "decades" of draws to determine the likelihood that a draw which would appear to be random (under the guidelines of the sanctioning bodies and the tournaments) would be as helpful to the top seeds advancing to at least the second round of the Grand Slam tournament.

According to the article, the unseeded players at the US Open are supposed to be placed into the bracket truly randomly. You could get the #1 seed, you could get a qualifier. But it is supposed to be random.

For 10,000 such draws of the US Open, the average difficulty of the first-round opponent for the top seeds only correlated to a difficulty of an actual first-round opponent in one of the last 10 US Opens about 3 times out of a 1,000 for the men's draw.

(Comparing that 0.3% to the other Grand Slams, ESPN found Wimbledon did so a little more than a third of the time (37%), and the French (69.5%) and Australian (71.2%) did so quite a bit of the time.)

One would have to think this is a business decision. I mean, even consider the lower Wimbledon number -- you don't think they want to serve their #1 seeds a dish of Fresh Qualifier To Squash at Centre Court to open their tournament?? Ya think????

The higher seeds, the further they go, people are going to know who they are... And that means tickets and ratings. Think this is coincidence? Really????

And it's worse in the women's draws for both Wimbledon and the US Open. Both the Australian and French effectively do retain fairness in most respects (over 90% of the time in both cases). Wimbledon (and I'd be shocked if this wasn't the attempts to keep the Williams' in the tournament as long as possible for American viewers/attendees/corporate money!) falls to about 30%.

The US Open? They could not come up with ONE DRAW in TEN THOUSAND which was as easy for the top seeds as the draws they've been getting in real life. A -- CLEAN -- ZERO!!!

The results? An average draw for a seeded player should come down with an average rating (if you rank the 128 players in each draw 1-128 and remove the top 32 for seeding purposes) of about 80.5.

The article notes that, for the top two seeds in the last ten years of the US Open, the average rank of the first round opponent for the men was 98.5, and 97.2 for the women!

So I cry ultimate BULLSHIT when Tournament Referee Brian Earley (who oversees the draw) states this about the US Open draw:

"What would the U.S. Open gain by fixing the draw in this way? I believe the U.S. Open would gain nothing," Earley said. "I think that that would be a risk that the U.S. Open would never take. Never."

BULLSHIT.

You gain viewers, you gain interest, you gain advertising revenue for the television networks, you gain storylines which can be exploited over the course of the two weeks of the tournament.

Especially in the United States, where (outside of the Williams sisters) there are few-to-no meaningful professional tennis players on the world circuit at this time, the better players are going to get people talking.

And you're a liar if you don't think that this doesn't come into play when the draws are made.

Howard Cosell's Sixth Principle of "Sports Syndrome" In Action: WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE???

As everyone collectively orgasms over the end of the lockout and the beginning of the NFL preseason with only one preseason game scrapped, I can say honestly that the only interest I have in the NFL this year is for articles like the one I am about to write, even though this one is NOT about the National/Neanderthal Felon League.

The newest incarnation of the Arena Football League is about to wrap up with it's ArenaBowl this weekend, but the incident which you are about to see comes from a semifinal game between Jacksonville and Georgia. It is held in Jacksonville, and Jacksonville has just scored an early touchdown in the first quarter of the game.

Then, All Hell Broke Loose, as you can see in this video...

The fucking douchebag in the endzone of the first row of seats reaches over, and grabs the kick returner the instant he catches the ball, killing the play (and, with a short field, there's always the chance of kick returns for scores, much more easily than in the 100-yard game). Then, at least four players from the Jacksonville team go over and congratulate the motherfucker for actually taking part in rigging the contest for the home team!

(And, yes, Jacksonville won the trip to the ArenaBowl, 64-55!)

The guy openly commits four penalties on the play, and three of which would've been called if he'd actually been in the damn game! He face-masks the guy, face-guards him afterward, and attempts to interfere with even him catching the damn ball!!

WHAT THE FUCK PODUNK HALF-INBRED "SPORTS LEAGUE" ALLOWS THE FANS TO DO THAT WITH PENALTY LESS THAN ABSOLUTE FORFEITURE OF THE CONTEST???

Well, unfortunately for the AFL Commissioner, Jerry Kurz, his e-mail is available for anyone to comment to him from the AFL's website.

So, I had but one question for him in this e-mail after witnessing this shithead piss all over legitimate sport:

How in the bloody blazes do you not expect fans to interfere with your contests on a routine and wholesale basis, after not only does the guy openly prevent the kick from being returned, but his home team compliments him on it??

You are not legitimate sport in any way, shape, or form -- especially if you are going to let the fans run roughshod over a playoff game.

That should've been grounds for forfeiture of the entire contest.

I will leave you with Howard Cosell's Sixth Symptom of Sports Syndrome -- we are beyond help at this point...

The fan is sacred, even as sports are. He pays the freight, thus he is an entitled being. The media people tell him this every day. Therefore, once within the arena, his emotions whetted by the Sports Syndrome, the fan adopts what John Stewart Mill found to be the classic confusion in the American thought process, the confusion between Liberty and License—a natural and probable consequence of which is fan violence.

And, now, it appears, in the right moment (Jeffrey Maier, anyone?), fixing the game for the home team too??

ON EDIT 8/10/11: Got an actual response from the Commissioner's Office. Didn't agree with all of it (he made note of the ejection of the fan and a penalty enforced on the play, as well as questioning rationality of forfeiting the contest), but I can see his position. Still, the absurdity of this action is just beyond words!

Since the bastards have decided to play the Neanderthal Football League, one thing you can watch for...

And something the National Felon League slipped in during the later stages of the lockout...

Every scoring play, in every game, must now be reviewed by the review official.

Every touchdown, extra point, field goal, and safety...

Gee, you think that might open the door to a few things???

(And not just a few more commercials?)

Because I love soccer, I hope I'm wrong on this one...

But this is FIFA and Sepp Blatter we're talking about here.

The United States has won it's way into the Women's World Cup Final.

Their opponents are not favorites Germany or long-standing rivals Brazil. (The USA beat the latter in penalty kicks (after a goalazo two minutes into stoppage time of the last of the overtime!) in a stellar quarterfinal rife with controversy with the officiating.)

It's Japan, who stunned Germany in the quarterfinal with an overtime win of their own and then defeated Sweden, who defeated the USA in the group phase.

As I said, it's FIFA and Sepp. What's to say there might not be a little sympathy vote here? I have serious suspicions Japan is going to get the benefit of the doubt here.

Remember: In Final Fantasy X, as Wakka said: "At least we have blitz."

ON EDIT: Japan are World Champions, in penalties after a 2-2 draw. Anyone else think there was, at the very least, a lay-down here?

I think we now have our answer on Super Bowl XLV...

(Image from Men's Journal Magazine website.)

There's the reason the Green Bay Packers won Super Bowl XLV.

That's James Harrison, of the Pittsburgh Steelers. If I were Commissioner, he'd be banned from the fucking game for life the moment there was a new CBA.

James Harrison has just crossed the line into serious territory. He has basically decided that he would rather be an inner city gangsta than a complicit NFL football player.

In the interview with Men's Journal Magazine, James Harrison: Confessions of an NFL Hitman, James Harrison basically goes off on everybody but James Harrison.

Here's how he termed how he had to handle a snake bare-handed to protect his son:

“My son was here visiting, so that bitch had to bounce out. ASAP.”

Real classy for the highest-fined player in the NFL last year.

He's apparently been this kind of a problem since high school (suspended a number of times), and, as a result, had to pay his own way through Kent State to play college football.

On his initial statement about Roger Goodell before he goes off on what was described as a three-day rant:

“But up until last year, there was no word of me being dirty — till Roger Goodell, who’s a crook and a puppet, said I was the dirtiest player in the league. If that man was on fire and I had to piss to put him out, I wouldn’t do it. I hate him and will never respect him.”

If the shoe fits, scum.

That simple. If the shoe fucking fits, then you have to wear it. You were the one who openly pronounced that you like to "hurt people" after a game in the NFL. You were the one who was fined $100,000 by the league for various offenses, and became the poster child for Goodell's idiotic pandering to the players by not repeatedly suspending your sorry ass.

You want to know why? The article shows a couple of nice facts:

• 468 players were put on injured reserve (the list which declares a player so injured that he is no longer able nor allowed to play that season. That is an average of over 25 players per NFL week (yes, some of them occurred in the preseason), but was also a full 22% increase over the prior year.
• Last year was also the Year of the Concussion. 261 documented concussions took place according to the Men's Journal article. That was a 30% increase from two years before.
• On one Sunday, 11 concussions occurred, including two on the same play and two others by Harrison (neither flagged, both appeared to be ejection fouls for intention to injure).

This was why Goodell upped the fines and pussy-footed around the suspensions. This earlier blog post on my blog explains how pussy-footed Goodell is on that matter.

Of course, this doesn't stop Harrison from using the same gay slur which got Kobe Bryant and Joachim Noah in trouble against the Commissioner of the league.

Now, let's juxtapose two things for a second: That slur and the picture. Someone please tell me that I'm crazy that there's an implied threat on the life of the Commissioner of the National Football League somewhere in this equation. I have no fucking use for Goodell either, but I've seen far less made actionable as a threat.

He believes the league targetted the Steelers because:

• they use too much force
• have too much "swag"
• and are predominantly black.

Well, James, when you basically go all gangsta in this picture up here and all buy "gangsta-grip" your pieces in front of the world to see how bad-ass you claim you are, I fully now see why.

Oh, and you can kiss Hines Ward goodbye for a couple weeks too. Jim Rome had advice for you DUI idiots a long time ago.

Do you honestly believe that Roger Goodell is going to allow your sorry ass to act like you have and get a Super Bowl ring for it?

Not if ESPN doesn't like you. Maybe if your name is Michael Vick!!

I mean, this guy basically puts the knees as about the only out-of-bounds area to hit. In fact, one comment appears to imply that if the player has a choice on where to hit Harrison (high in the head or low in the knee), not only would he take the helmet-to-helmet, he'd pay the guy's fine for doing it!!

We want this kind of player in the National Football League? No wonder friends of mine are openly calling this the Neanderthal Felon League!

The guy is simply driven as a completely pissed-off out-of-control punk. The only other thing he might answer to is his $51,000,000 contract!

James Harrison is a perfect reason why I will not miss the locked-out NFL this fall.

ON EDIT: SportsNation has a poll on what should be done with Harrison.

About 40% of 46,000 votes (as of when I posted this and voted) want no punishment. 35% believe he should be suspended, with most of that adding a fine into the equation.

A revealing sense of what the Neanderthal Felon League follows: Only 21% of about 16,000 votes believe it is more troubling that Harrison used a gay slur to continue to slam Roger Goodell than stating that Ben Rothlesberger was no Peyton Manning (and he knows it). (Three times that number reverse the situation.)

And do you have a problem with the above photo: Out of about 15,500 votes, only about 43% do.

So let me get this straight: The following BCS situations have now been vacated...

USC: Participation in 2005 and 2006 BCS National Championship Games, 2005 BCS National Championship (NCAA sanctions, BCS)

Ohio State: Victory in 2011 Sugar Bowl (self-imposed).

And today, you can pretty much tack on Georgia Tech's participation in the 2010 Orange Bowl! They just got four years probation and their ACC title win yanked.

When are we going to come to the conclusion that the BCS itself brings a lot of this on?

Oh... My.... Lord.....

Roger Clemens has just won a MISTRIAL in his perjury case.

Why?

Because the goddamned Federal government couldn't go TWO DAYS into it's case without bringing to the jury evidence which was already ruled inadmissable.

If I'm the judge, the case is OVER -- they can't retry it.

Why? The commentators said it better than I could.

The Feds are in so far over their heads, it's not funny.

The Steroid Era in baseball, which clearly saved the game for anyone paying attention, has several decades of chicanery behind it, and probably has the protection of $elig, Fehr, and most of the sponsors of the game.

The Federal government has about as much of a prayer of figuring this out as they do blowing up baseball itself, since doing the former would do the latter in short order.