Wednesday, November 11, 2026

After Further Review: Jake the Awake's Passing Fancy, Week Nine

It's that time again.  Time for the slop-play discussions.

Jake makes a point in a post he does before he sent out this video:  Vegas was generous with the public this week -- and it's really no surprise.  You have to do that occasionally on their end, or the public gets wise and stops biting on your proverbial fishing line.

Overlay:  Rapeis Winston gets pawed at by a declawed Philadelphia Eagle.

10)  Chicago-Tampa Bay Sunday night.  7-0 Chicago, 6 minutes to go in the first.

3rd and 8 for Chicago in their own territory, Caleb Williams goes back and throws about a 4-yard pass on 3rd and 8 to Luther Burden III.  And let the missing begin.  Burden makes three people dive and miss and outruns at least three others.  It's ALL Yards After Catch, and the lead is doubled.

9) Same game.  1st and 10 for the Bears at the Tampa 35.  Midway through the second quarter, 14-3 Bears, Tampa has just failed a 4th and 1 from the Tampa 35.

And it's a theme you will see a number of times this week from Jake -- played at with my title of this post.  Interceptions seen as intentional.  And, in many cases, they are.

Williams goes back to pass, has a clean pocket for a while, but someone gets through.  Jake points out an obvious checkdown.  (Remember, first and 10...)

Lofts one, completely "underthrows" it.  The only person with a prayer of getting it is wearing Tampa Bay white.

8)  Continuing with the same theme, it's Patriots-Packers.  Drake Maye tosses one where only the defense can get it.  Second offensive play of the game.

Clean pocket, Maye is at least three yards wide of his receiver and the defender becomes the receiver.

7)  Colts-Cowboys.  20-10 Dallas, Indy has the ball, late third quarter.

Daniel Jones short screen to Ashton Dulin.  I'll admit the blocking was good, but there was NO containment help behind it??  And then the one guy who could've tried tackling Dulin did another one of those flail jobs that NEVER WORKS???

6) Eagles-Giants, and it's time for Muff Punt City.  8-6 Philly, a minute into the second quarter.

And today's applause goes to Charlie Jones, who does everything in his power to give the ball to Philadelphia.  Though a number of Giants fans think Jones needs to be cut, and some believe he may be injured, he's still on the team -- at least as of today...

5) And speaking of the music, it's time for the Return of the Doink.

Jake could only find one this week.  (And I could SWEAR I thought I heard of several more just in Week 9 -- but Jake could only find one for a verified current total of 25 in nine weeks.)

It was in Lions-Dolphins.  6-3 Detroit, last play to end the half is a rather short field goal attempt for Miami, and it's another one of those where Zane Gonzalez is probably aided to the doink on the other side -- the kick is never going to get to the uprights until it is curved back to the upright for the doink.

4) Vikings-Bills.  13-6 Buffalo, about four minutes to go in the third, Vikings have the ball just in Buffalo territory.

This one a little less so than some of the others, but it might've been the straw on the camel's back to get JJ McCarthy back to Minnesota in a trade many believe MIGHT bring the Vikings back to Super Bowl contention.  (We'll see this week at Lambeau.)

Because Carson Wentz at least forces a play out of one of the defenders he's trying to throw past to Justin Jefferson.  Second pick of the quarter, and it's clear he can't do anything tonight.

3) Giants-Eagles.  It's the overlaid play.  6 1/2 minutes to go in the third, 13-8 Giants, and Rapeis Winston is in as backup quarterback.

Famous Rapeis finally has the play break down and, surprisingly for the Turnover Factory, he is able to break out where Jordan Davis of the Eagles does an absolute paw-job, FOUR TIMES, and can't get him.

Leads to a touchdown for 19-8.

2) Back to Cowboys-Colts, this time the Cowboys have the ball.  Three minutes into the fourth quarter, 20-17 Dallas.

Dak Prescott heaves a prayer to Ceedee Lamb.  Catches it, is not touched down, and gets up and runs.

Problem?  About 25 yards later, Lamb fumbles the ball to the Colts!!   And it's Lamb deciding to hold the ball way out there with just one hand and pays for it.

1) And #1 goes to 49ers-Raiders, and this one happened IN the stadium rather than the fights in the parking lot!

And it's another scripted interception (at least in Jake's opinion), and probably was the straw breaking THAT camel's back and the #1 draft pick Mendoza becomes the Raiders quarterback for the rest of the season.

First play of the second half, 21-10 49ers.  Raiders have the ball after a touchback to start the half.

Kirk Cousins gets the dropsies, but recovers and tries to make something out of the play.  Jake notes a checkdown.  The play he makes is right to the 49ers defender, Jadon Duggan, who waltzes into the end zone for the rout being on.

Monday, November 9, 2026

2026 NFL Week Nine Score Report

15 games this week, only two byes.

That makes 136 now for the year.

  • 667 points for the week, 44.67 per game.
  • 6,244 points for the season, 45.91 per game for the season.
  • 2,001 penalties for the season, 232 for the week.  15.47 per game for the week, 14.71 for the season.
  • And an interesting stat:  Green Bay, one of the most-penalized teams in the league this season, was called (tied with another team) for the fewest penalties of any team this week -- three.
  • Most penalized is now Cleveland.  Minnesota now has the least.  
  • Home teams only 5-9 this week.  66-62-1 for the season.
  • As I said in another post, only six of the 15 games finished within one score, and only one game of the late block on forward did so.  79/136 games this season have finished within one score.
  • Every one of the six games finished with either a Cliffhanger, a Last Chance Miss, or some combination of multiples.
  • Only two other games were competitive, within one score at some point in the fourth quarter.
  • Six Cliffhangers in three games this week.  56 in 31 games.
  • Four Last Chance Misses in four games this week.  Meaning 46 games now have had at least one semi-feasible chance at tying or winning the game in the last two minutes and/or overtime.
  • Multiples:
    • Double Cliffhanger in Indianapolis. 50-yard go-ahead FG for 23-20 Indianapolis at 1:37. Dallas drives right down the field for the winning touchdown at 1:08. No feasible response.
    • And a real unsightly mess of a four-bagger in New Orleans.  Rushing touchdown for New Orleans at 58 seconds for 16-13.  Cleveland ties it with a 51-yard field goal with 8 seconds left in regulation.  Saints get the ball first in OT, almost six-minute drive for 23-16, but Cleveland DOES get the responding TD with about a minute left...  and misses the win-or-lose two-point conversion.  Triple Cliffhanger plus a Last Chance Miss.

Part of the reason I need a therapist is NOT...

... the reason I think they should get one.  I'll give you two examples of the complete uneducated tomfoolery of these fuckers on the White Right, including why one should get cleanly smacked upside the head.

And the other needs math.  We'll start with him, right-wing X idiot Gunther Eagleman:
To which I replied with the math: For the two to actually be equal (no, I don't believe it's as pronounced as some believe), New York would need about seven or eight more electoral votes.

Of course, you could be J6 scum Jake Lang, who should've been hung along with the rest of the J6 scum, proving again why his removal from the Earth would be addition by subtraction.

You all know how much the White Right abhors the Furry movement, for any number of reasons.

So much so that Jake Lang pulled off THIS STUNT over the weekend...
Read the Community Note: It was a CAT OWNERS' CONVENTION.

2026 NFL Week Nine Political and Kayfabe Rankings

After tonight's yawner, two statistics to start the recap:
  • Against the rest of the league, the NFC North is 20-4 -- tonight's blowout was only the fourth loss by the division against other teams.  (For reference, the AFC North is 16-8.)
  • Of the last 43 NFL games, only 20 have finished within one score.  After the 1 PM Eastern block Sunday, only the Sunday Night Cliffhanger in Chicago finished within one score.
With that, let's take a look at some rankings.

AFC Kayfabe:
  1. Buffalo
  2. Denver
  3. Jacksonville (Conference tiebreak over)
  4. Pittsburgh (HTH over Cincinnati, rematch is next Sunday night after Pittsburgh's bye week)
  5. Kansas City (Conference tiebreak over)
  6. Cincinnati (Pittsburgh and Cincinnati #2 Sunday, Kansas City and Cincinnati December 13)
  7. New England  (Conference tiebreak over Cleveland)
AFC Politicals:

1) Buffalo

Won the current battle of the #1 seeds, and won it handily.  That and the pimped MVP in Josh Allen makes them the easy #1, not only in the AFC, but in the entire NFL.

2) Denver

Mark down Christmas Day on Netflix.  That's when Buffalo and Denver will play.  But Denver does need to prove itself.  Its two losses are both by multiple scores to KC and SF.

3) Pittsburgh

Aaron Rodgers, COVIDIOT-8, says hi and screams MAGA.

4) Kansas City

A fair piece of a gap between there and here, but it can be bridged.

5) Jacksonville

Don't look now...

NFC Kayfabe:
  1. San Francisco
  2. Chicago
  3. NY Giants (5-2-1, next Dallas at 4-5)
  4. Carolina (division record over the Aints at 3-5, they play on Sunday)
  5. The rest of the NFC North, Detroit first (HTH over)
  6. Minnesota (yep, all the way from the 1 to the 6)
  7. Green Bay (last in the division, at 6-3)
Political:

1) San Francisco

Although too much more with Fred Warner's helmet, they may reconsider.

2) Chicago
2A) NY Giants

I place them both effectively in the same slot because they're there, tenuously, for similar outside-political reasons.  If the Giants ownership is MAGA, watch out for them.  And if the league is wanting the Bears in more conservative Indiana, same effect.

4) Detroit

They might be held in the normal Green Bay "Jobber to the Stars" position right now.

Yes, I know I mentioned I would want more look at this stretch of Green Bay's schedule.  But I cannot feasibly put them anywhere on this list as long as Josh Jacobs is hanging around -- especially with the second set of allegations.

Dud of the Week:

DISHONORABLE MENTION:  Unless otherwise mentioned, a good number of the losing teams the last three weeks.

This is NOT NORMAL, and I probably should check the TV ratings to see if the NFL being unable to keep games close at this point in this season is impacting the ratings.

BRONZE MEDAL:  The NFC Suck.

All four teams have three wins.  That's the good news.

The bad news is that they only have eight total wins outside the division.  And it's Week Nine.

SILVER MEDAL:  The Los Angeles Chargers, the leaders in the clubhouse for Tank Bowl.

And who's on their schedule they can really beat, barring something really freaking bizarre -- we're talking Survivor Pool-killing bizarre?

Only three losses of the eight within one score too.

Jets in two weeks, Buccaneers December 6, Miami on the 27th...  Oof.

GOLD MEDAL:  THESE BOZOS, who once again prove that the NFL needs to find some odd way to ensure that the Raiders and 49ers never meet again in a football game of any kind, regardless of where Raider Nation hangs its hat.

After Further Review: Walmart on Line One?

You know, NFL, this is why I've got a reader who believes Walmart is influencing the officiating...

Saturday, November 7, 2026

After Further Review (College): I must again remind you, they work for the conferences...

And don't think for a second that they aren't trying to get Texas and Arch Manning to the CFP and somehow shoehorn Nepo Baby into a Heisman and the #1 Draft Pick, even though he's clearly AT LEAST a year away.

2026 NFL Week Eight Fine Blotter

You know the drill by now.  Let's get to Week 8.

NOTE:  Since we're starting to get a number of these every week:  All information regarding multiply-fined players from earlier in the season and now is assumptive that all appeals went through on the previous fines.

One interesting piece of news has come across the transom:

  • Green Bay Packers:  Jordan Love.  It's too bad for the NFL that Halloween came after that debacle in Detroit.  He and his wife dressed up as blind NFL referees for Halloween.  There is no word at this time, though it may still be forthcoming, as to whether Love faces league discipline.
Now to the report:

Striking, etc. (I usually start from the top and separate multiple-fine offenders and/or Points of Emphasis):
  • Atlanta:  Drake London, $12,537
  • Green Bay:  Matthew Golden, $12,537 For an act for which even I agree he should've been ejected.   Makes him a TWO-TIME LOSER.
Conduct:
  • Cleveland drew two in the third quarter:  Quinshon Judkins, $11,941
  • Cleveland:  And Sam Williams, $6,361, both for taunting.  Both now are TWO-TIME LOSERS.
  • Detroit drew two in the first quarter:  Amon-Ra St. Brown
  • Detroit:  And Jameson Williams, both $11,941, both taunting.  Technically, this makes St. Brown a FIVE-TIME LOSER from those incidents in Week Three, though it is unclear how many, if any of the four, got appealed off.  Chances are one or more did.  Williams reestablishes himself as a TWO-TIME LOSER, an earlier taunting fine having been reversed.   
  • Jacksonville:  Brenton Strange, $11,941, taunting.
  • Miami:  Ollie Gordon, but because he got a taunting fine in the preseason, his was $17,911 for second offense.  That makes him a TWO-TIME LOSER and he's confirmed.
  • Washington:  Charles Omenihu, $14,926, violent gesture.
Late Hit:
  • Arizona:  LJ Collier, $8,972
Face Mask:
  • Jacksonville:  Ruke Ohorhoro, $11,941
  • Denver:  Eyioma Uwazurike, $6,361
  • Cincinnati:  Russ Yeast, $6,361
  • And one more I'll get to later with the Points of Emphasis.
Helmet fouls:
  • Cleveland's THIRD of the week:  Tyson Campbell, $23,882
  • Dallas got two of these:  DeMarvion Overshown, $9,528 TWO-TIME LOSER.
  • Dallas:  And PJ Locke, $19,444.  What made Locke's unusual?  It was in overtime!
  • Jacksonville:  Branson Combs, $5,583
  • New England:  Robert Spillane, $23,882
  • Philadelphia:  Landon Dickerson, $22,456
  • Tennessee:  Alontae Taylor, $23,882
Roughing the Passer:
  • Dallas' THIRD of the week:  Rashan Gary, $17,911, head/neck.
  • Pittsburgh:  Jaquan Brisker, $17,911, head/neck
  • Tampa Bay:  A'Shawn Robinson, $17,500, late hit
  • Washington got two, totalling THREE for the week:  K'Lavon Chaisson, head/neck.
  • Washington:  And Odafe Oweh, both $17,911, Oweh's for the body weight rule.  Making Oweh a TWO-TIME LOSER.
Leg Whip:
  • LA Chargers:  Charlie Kolar, $17,911
Low Block:
  • New York Jets:  Joe Tippmann, $12,537
And the Points of Emphasis:
  • Las Vegas:  Jeremy Chinn, $17,911, defenseless player.  His first strike.
  • Jacksonville's FOURTH fine of the week:  Dennis Gardeck, $9,722, blindside block.  His first strike.
Only three PoE fines this week, and the third is part of the Big Loser of the Week, over $35,000...

And both within the first five minutes of the game, making me wonder why he stuck around very long.
  • Baltimore:  Roquan Smith, $17,911 for a defenseless player hit in the first minute of the game.
  • Baltimore:  Roquan Smith, and another $17,911 for a facemask four minutes later.
His first Points of Emphasis strike for the defenseless player, but he's a repeat offender on the face mask.  Meaning a confirmed THREE-TIME LOSER.  Neither foul was flagged.

31 this week, the highest since 38 in Week Two.