As everyone collectively orgasms over the end of the lockout and the beginning of the NFL preseason with only one preseason game scrapped, I can say honestly that the only interest I have in the NFL this year is for articles like the one I am about to write, even though this one is NOT about the National/Neanderthal Felon League.
The newest incarnation of the Arena Football League is about to wrap up with it's ArenaBowl this weekend, but the incident which you are about to see comes from a semifinal game between Jacksonville and Georgia. It is held in Jacksonville, and Jacksonville has just scored an early touchdown in the first quarter of the game.
Then, All Hell Broke Loose, as you can see in this video...
The fucking douchebag in the endzone of the first row of seats reaches over, and grabs the kick returner the instant he catches the ball, killing the play (and, with a short field, there's always the chance of kick returns for scores, much more easily than in the 100-yard game). Then, at least four players from the Jacksonville team go over and congratulate the motherfucker for actually taking part in rigging the contest for the home team!
(And, yes, Jacksonville won the trip to the ArenaBowl, 64-55!)
The guy openly commits four penalties on the play, and three of which would've been called if he'd actually been in the damn game! He face-masks the guy, face-guards him afterward, and attempts to interfere with even him catching the damn ball!!
WHAT THE FUCK PODUNK HALF-INBRED "SPORTS LEAGUE" ALLOWS THE FANS TO DO THAT WITH PENALTY LESS THAN ABSOLUTE FORFEITURE OF THE CONTEST???
Well, unfortunately for the AFL Commissioner, Jerry Kurz, his e-mail is available for anyone to comment to him from the AFL's website.
So, I had but one question for him in this e-mail after witnessing this shithead piss all over legitimate sport:
How in the bloody blazes do you not expect fans to interfere with your contests on a routine and wholesale basis, after not only does the guy openly prevent the kick from being returned, but his home team compliments him on it??
You are not legitimate sport in any way, shape, or form -- especially if you are going to let the fans run roughshod over a playoff game.
That should've been grounds for forfeiture of the entire contest.
I will leave you with Howard Cosell's Sixth Symptom of Sports Syndrome -- we are beyond help at this point...
The fan is sacred, even as sports are. He pays the freight, thus he is an entitled being. The media people tell him this every day. Therefore, once within the arena, his emotions whetted by the Sports Syndrome, the fan adopts what John Stewart Mill found to be the classic confusion in the American thought process, the confusion between Liberty and License—a natural and probable consequence of which is fan violence.
And, now, it appears, in the right moment (Jeffrey Maier, anyone?), fixing the game for the home team too??
ON EDIT 8/10/11: Got an actual response from the Commissioner's Office. Didn't agree with all of it (he made note of the ejection of the fan and a penalty enforced on the play, as well as questioning rationality of forfeiting the contest), but I can see his position. Still, the absurdity of this action is just beyond words!
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