Super Farce XLIX: Thugs vs. Cheats

America, my friend has it right.  (And thanks to my friend for, in the very early morning today, pointing this out.)

For your support of Adrian Peterson, Ray Rice, Greg Hardy, and the thugs, rapists, wife-beaters, child abusers, and general scum which permeate the NFL...

This country, this ailing society, got the Super Bowl it most cleanly deserves.

We already know what happened in the first game, probably the worst example of Roger Goodell basically considering most of America to be too stupid to hide it anymore I've ever seen (and that includes Tuck Rule, Seven Second Field Goal, and even at least most of the Tebow-Mania Era)...

The second game ended up being what the first game was "supposed to be" -- a blow out.  A massive blow out.

And, if we use my WrestleMania analogy from before, with King Kong Bundy getting the syndicated-TV main-event win over a "Jobber to the Stars", then that second game was the old Gene Okerlund "WWF Event Center" segment where, to prod the fans for Bundy's opponent, they show Hulk Hogan in training for his battle (sore ribs and all) with Bundy in WrestleMania II.

Well, if they had any goodwill planned, that lasted, according to Deadspin, about...

Six hours or so.

Early this morning,  Deadspin reported that the NFL, almost immediately after the AFC Championship Game Coronation, began an investigation into the New England Patriots to determine if they were illegally tampering with the footballs by deflating them to make the balls easier for Tom Brady to throw (and easier for the Patriots' receivers to catch) in the cold weather.

If caught, they lose draft picks -- which will only lead to the inevitable questions on sports-talk radio:  "Draft Picks or Championships -- which would you pick, America?"

Here's the completely asinine part of it, though.

If we are to believe the Baltimore Ravens, that isn't the ONLY incident of cheating the Cheatriots have done in these playoffs.

Against the Ravens, the Patriots were accused of taking a lineman off the field for another position player without notifying the officials as to which of the two players was ineligible, creating an advantage situation for the Patriots because the Ravens did not know which of the two relevant players to cover.

Taken alone, probably sour grapes.  When you add the flavor of the investigation revealed this morning, however, they lose most benefit of the doubt...

In a season where an NFL wife is shown being knocked out in an elevator...

In a season where the NFL's most popular homophobe running back is proven to be a child-beating pig (and I still believe he had something to do with the murder of the other kid too!)...

In a season where the NFL has gotten away with pretty much every lie...

It is the perfect end to the most imperfect of seasons.

What a fucking joke.