Roger Goodell's State of the NFL propaganda fest speech was today, the Friday before the Super Bowl.
And, as expected, the motherfucker lied through his teeth on almost everything he said.
Predictably, Deadspin picked it up, and found that Herr Goodell lied at least FORTY-FOUR TIMES in the speech, according to Drew Magary.
So, time permitting, here's at least a small selection, and some comments...
1) "It has been a season of amazing competition, challenges and real progress."
Even if you don't discuss the lies regarding Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson, et. al. for the "challenges" part (and don't get me started on "progess" -- see my previous comments on the No More ad and how farcical that lie is), the NFL was well on pace that, by mid-November, there was speculation that blowouts were becoming the new NFL normal.
From my year-end score report:
- Games within one score at some point in the 4th quarter: 2013: 68% 2014: 62.89%
- Games decided within one score: 2013: 48% 2014: 41.79%
- Games decided by a score in the last two minutes or overtime: 2013: 21.875% 2014: 15.625%
You won't be saying that once the courts or arbitrators nullify all conduct policies.
Football, especially CTE-laced football, is not made up of good and caring people.
It is made up of out-of-control monsters, created and cultivated and nurtured by the system which allows them to be what they are, many of them on drugs.
And it's not just them or the corrupt owners or administration: The fans can hardly be seen as "good and caring people" when domestic violence has a statistically-significant increase in NFL cities where they lose that week -- with another such increase when the game is an upset.
"This is a bad game, where bad men do bad things to bad men."
This is what Goodell will say when the truth is allowed to come out.
3) "We are doing more to protect our players from unnecessary risks."
This is where you learn the reality of the Goodell WWNFL and the masses who swear to it.
This league and most of it's fans see the very life and death as "necessary risks" that the players knew about when they started football as children.
Which see all the complaints about "pussification of America" and all the homophobic slurs which come with it.
YOU CANNOT "PROTECT PLAYERS FROM UNNECESSARY RISKS" WITHOUT COMPLETELY ALTERING OR ELIMINATING THE SPORT OF FOOTBALL AND MANY OF THE INHUMAN MONSTERS WHO PLAY IT.
PERIOD.
The sport of football is like NASCAR on steroids -- except, in NASCAR, in most sane cases, the crashes people watch for, people want to see the drivers get out of.
This is NOT the case in 2014 WWNFL. Next lie, Goodell!!!
4) "Concussions were down 25%."
According to WHOM...
The team doctors whose first loyalties are to the team to get the player out there, at any and all cost?
What scares many ex-NFL fans I talk to is, with how many former players of the 80's, etc. are coming and saying they have CTE, etc., how many of today's players in the Bigger, Faster, Stronger WWNFL are going to be feeling it too.
You want to tell that statistic to the likes of Jimmy Clausen and Tony Jefferson and Terrelle Pryor and the like?
5) "The quality of the game continues to improve."
You can't even competently referee the games.
How do you expect the quality of play to improve?
Oh, to that end...
6) "Last year, technology improved officiating."
No, it only did exactly what I feared it would -- allowed you to have greater control over meaningful results.
And you STILL have to give one of the teams in a championship game the direct memo to lay down so you get Cheats vs. Thugs...
And let's not get into how technology allowed you not to call pass interference on the Cowboys in that one game... Technology helped you make the right call to save their asses.
Right? Right.
7) "The possibility of expanding the playoffs has been a topic the last couple of years. There are positives to it."
That's more a matter of perspective than a lie, per se.
Obviously it's more money for the owners and more injuries and headshots for the players.
Since we know the NFL is already demanding the College Football Playoff find another night than a Monday for it's championship, I think it's clear that, as soon as that gets cleared up, we're heading for a 16-team playoff or something.
8) "We are continuing our work to uphold the highest standards of responsible conduct so that we represent our fans and communities in a way that will make them proud."
9) "The new personal conduct policy emphasizes ongoing education, prevention, support services and raises the standards for all of us in the NFL. Most importantly, it is clearly more effective."
Two of the biggest lies in the speech.
First, you designed the new personal conduct policy to be struck down. You basically admit, face up, that a football player, by being a meaningful football player, is a protected rapist/robber/violent criminal/etc., and you can't systematically ensure that domestic violence and worse are adequately punished without going outside the Constitutional boundaries of a legal definition of "innocent until proven guilty".
In no uncertain terms, if we had an actual due process on a lot of football players (and this is grade-school and up!!!), the sport itself has to go on trial eventually. (Which see Lie #4, or would you like to talk to the families of the late Nancy and Daniel Benoit?)
This new personal conduct policy never makes it. The players win their grievance, as you desire, so you can tell me to go fuck off like the little ... I am, right Roger?
Second, you're going to use that to, within a year or two, strike down all the on-field safety initiatives, because most of these angry behemoths (even golden boys like Clay Matthews!!) can't abide by them.
For even an ounce of #8 to be true, you'd have to hold an FBI-level investigation of every current and prospective player, and I think you know in your heart, Mr. Goodell, that very few would actually pass if the truth were allowed to come to light.
For #9 to be true, you'd have to nullify the concept that everyone around the NFL knows -- that the next wife you hear about domestically abused by her husband in the NFL will probably have died as a result of the offense.
10) "On the issue of footballs used in the AFC Championship game, Ted Wells and our staff have been hard at work conducting a thorough and objective investigation."
That investigation should've been finished by about 6 PM Monday. NOT Monday January 26. Monday, January 19.
You KNEW those footballs were illegal at fucking HALFTIME!
That is a forfeiture offense under your own fucking rules, Mr. Goodell, and the on-field statistical truth about the Patriots coming out is the reason why!
Noticed something on NFL Live today at lunch, by the way: Over 400 rushing plays for the Patriots this year -- ZERO fumbles.
(Brady had six fumbles -- probably recorded as sacks or something. Wide receivers had 7, and a fullback with only three carries and six receptions had one. Source: Pro Football Reference.)
The graphic with that statistic, though, was quickly removed from the screen.
WHY? So you could basically cover up WHY the Patriots don't fumble the football?
Especially in cold weather, a slightly-deflated ball actually not only becomes easier to catch and throw, but also to HOLD ON TO.
I can figure this out. I'm not a professional!
11) "We are excited about the success of Thursday Night Football."
26-6. 56-14. 45-14. 42-10.
Then you get two close ones.
35-21. 28-10. 24-3. 22-9.
Then Chiefs-Raiders is close.
41-28. 12-6 (close, but an insomnia cure)
Then another close one to wrap the Thursday schedule.
If you're excited about THAT track record, Roger. You're not only a liar, but DELUSIONAL!!
Part 2 forthcoming.
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