2023 NFL Week One After Further Review Part Three

No, I do not agree with many of Jake The Asshole's opinions.  No, Aaron Rodgers did not script his injury.

However, his weekly videos are some of the most able places to get a good look at some of the controversial calls, so mute them if you must, and I'll walk you through 'em and see if he has anything on the 10 plays in this week's entry.

10)  Chiefs-Lions, Thursday Night Football opener in Kansas City.  14-7 KC, 4 minutes into the third, and Jake's got one here.  This is the pick-six for Detroit to tie the game, but note that Kadarius Toney (who had SEVERAL drops in this game) literally lets a perfect ball go through his hands, to Brian Branch, who takes it to the house.  Yeah, he's got one there.

9) Saints-Titans.  7:45 to go in the second quarter, tied at 6.  Yeah, this one's 50-50.  Saw this one while doing research.  Derek Carr basically gets away with one (almost) when his arm is hit as the ball is cocked and it's coming loose -- but the ball is still in his hand (even if loose) as the arm is going forward.  Ruled incomplete, Tennessee challenges.  (Good challenge, IMODO)  They lose the challenge.  Leads to a Saints field goal, Saints win by 1.  I can see why Jake included it, but that's no more than a 50-50 there.

8) Yep, Jake's singing chops -- it's RETURN OF THE DOINK.  For those who don't know, it's a common theme -- the excessive number of kicks off the upright, crossbar, or some combination.  13-7 Seattle, 31 seconds to go in the half.  Seattle's trying a 39-yard FG, off the right upright and no good.  Rams basically take control from there in the second half with 23 unanswered.

7) DOINK #2, as Jake continues to sing.  (He actually has appropriated "Return of the Mack" and created this song for this situation.)  Patriots-Eagles.  It's the Eagles turn to doink a 48-yard attempt.  That one's good, though.  13:21 in the 4th, that makes the Eagles lead eight.

6) Bills-Jets Monday Night -- and Jake finally comes to terms with something I've noticed a number of times, though I attribute it to the same magnets which he also believes "There's Magnets In The Poles [Uprights]".  Technology in the balls.  He actually posits (he's not sure -- I do think this is magnets) possible taking control of the ball in flight remotely.

This is apparently the game-tying "ball in the air at the gun" Field Goal.  Buffalo must get this to send the game to extra time.  I have to think this is a rather rudimentary doink-through field goal, like #7.  That said, he does say what I've noticed already:  Too many doinks for it to be coincidence.  But this one doesn't look like it has the double-kink I've seen in the air which would indicate more possibility of magnetic or other manipulation in the air.

5) Colts-Jaguars, Travis Etienne, and a slop play.  Into the line, bounces outside, 53 Indy faceplants, 33 Indy faceplants, 25 Indy faceplants, touchdown Jacksonville.  Seals the game 31-21 with 4 minutes left.

4) Another one from Eagles-Patriots.  Purposely tipped INT?  84 New England tips it in the air, pick, then faceplants with the angle.  And Jake stops before you see several Patriots cease trying, pick six.  10-0 Eagles, 5 minutes to go in the first period.

3) Falcons-Panthers.  3rd and 4 from the 11.  Swing pass, Carolina defender (#49) sniffs it out, but does the ol' faceplant as he somehow goes for the feet.  And 7 and 24 "just can't get there in time", and the receiver splits 'em for six.  First score of the game on the first play of the second quarter, 7-0 Falcons.

2) Bears-Packers.  Pick-six for the Packers, thrown into split double coverage, then the Bears player actually makes a hit and HE PAYS FOR IT somehow!!!  And everyone else just makes it semi-convenient for the Packers to get the pick-six.  38-14 before a pity touchdown makes it 38-20.

1) I've got an idea...  And I type this out as I watch it...

YEP.  We agree this week.  It's the winning punt return on MNF for the Jets.  For me, it was probably between that and the pass interference by the Chargers to give the Dolphins a field goal at halftime in a game they won by two.

39 of the Bills never has the angle.

41 of the Bills just completely whiffs and gives up.

But then after a while, Jake misses the big penalty everybody is talking about, as #55 for the Jets, Chazz Suratt leg-whips out #85 of the Bills.  Jake blames the Bills player -- that's a 15-yard penalty.  

Yes, the punter can't tackle worth a shit, but he is then blocked in the back by #21 of the Jets, Ashtyn Davis.

Jake goes complete slop-play, I believe they missed two penalties on the play...

I will not dignify the Aaron Rodgers portion of the video.  Please explain to me, Jake, how a leg can quiver in that manner and it not be something completely tearing and rolling up...

No.