2022 Week 13 AFC Kayfabe and Political Rankings

Even though it's 5-6 Tampa vs. 4-7 New Orleans tonight, the fact that the NFC South SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS means I probably should not do the NFC one until after tonight.

Well, this is interesting:  Miami and Kansas City both lost, setting the AFC into turmoil -- and major injuries to Tua and Lamar may do it worse -- so much so, that Sports Illustrated is actually beginning to put Cincinnati back on the map.

Kayfabe:

AFC East:  Buffalo 9-3, Miami 8-4, Jets 7-5, Patriots 6-6

AFC North:  Baltimore 8-4, Cincinnati 8-4

AFC South:  Tennessee 7-5

AFC West:  Kansas City 9-3, LA Chargers 6-6

Tiebreakers:

Buffalo-Kansas City for the #1 seed:  Buffalo won Week 6.

Baltimore-Cincinnati for the AFC North:  Baltimore won Week 5.

Miami-Cincinnati for the #5 seed:  Cincinnati won Week 4.

1. Buffalo (9-3, AFC North, wins HTH tiebreaker over Kansas City)
2. Kansas City (9-3, AFC West, loses HTH tiebreaker with Buffalo)
3. Baltimore (8-4, AFC North, wins HTH tiebreaker over Cincinnati)
4. Tennessee (7-5, AFC South)
5. Cincinnati (8-4, loses divisional HTH tiebreaker with Baltimore, wins wild-card HTH tiebreaker over Miami)
6. Miami (8-4, loses HTH tiebreaker with Cincinnati)
7. NY Jets (7-5)

Political Rankings:

Oof.  This is a difficult ask this week, because two major injuries make Baltimore and Miami very tough to rank.  In both cases, their sole relevance is at the quarterback position -- Miami's even more blatant than Baltimore's!

1) Buffalo

And their quarterback isn't much better off in the equation.  The AFC could, very easily, be a "Last Marketable Player Standing" operation at this rate.

2) Kansas City

Not because I want to - because this would ensure an NFC Super Bowl victory (and, then, see the very top), but Kelce and Mahomes are probably the healthiest marketable contending players of the lot!

3) Miami (pending Tua's health)

4) Baltimore (pending Lamar's health)

5) Cincinnati

They're on the fringes and the ace in the hole again, but the fact is the fact:  They're talking about them again!

DUD OF THE WEEK:

Nominees:

Jacksonville:  Oof.  40-14 to Detroit????

Tennessee:  If anything, got exposed as the best of a bad lot when Philly did them in 35-10.

Baltimore and Denver in another "classic".

WINNERS:

THE HOUSTON TEXANS:  The first team eliminated from the NFL playoffs.  Maybe coddling a rapist quarterback as the sole relevant player of your franchise isn't such a damn good idea, is it?

And, of course, you know the credo:  DON'T GET ELIMINATED!!!