And now we've hit Day 50...

• The Bundesliga is back on hold.  German government officials will discuss next week as to what plans for a return to soccer in the country they will accept, so May 9 is out.
• Florida Governor Ron DeSantis believes that not only can sports come back in June and July, it can be done with fans.   What fucking drugs are you on?  If it's June or July when fans can come back -- what, June or July of 2022???   
• And, from Keith Olbermann retweeting it, it looks like we may be days from a shooting situation with the Michigan government. Armed men have stormed the Michigan State Senate...

Directly above me, men with rifles yelling at us. Some of my colleagues who own bullet proof vests are wearing them. I have never appreciated our Sergeants-at-Arms more than today. #mileg pic.twitter.com/voOZpPYWOs

— Senator Dayna Polehanki (@SenPolehanki) April 30, 2020

It is damn well FAR PAST TIME to get these "FREEDUMB!" types under control, and if that means we have to set it off and basically decide to take these fuckers up on it, so be it. I think it's clear they want those they consider "unfit" killed, so it doesn't really matter to me whether it's the virus that kills me (at that point) or their guns. Fuck you guys.

• The New York Post is reporting that the NFL is considering moving some games to Saturdays if college football cannot relaunch this Fall.
• Oh, how are you going to pull THIS off, NASCAR?  NASCAR has announced an aggressive relaunch schedule which will start May 17 and, between Charlotte and Darlington, hold seven races in 11 days: 

1. A 400 mile Cup race at Darlington on the 17th
2. A 200 mile XFinity race at Darlington on the 19th.
3. A 500 kilometer Cup race at the Darlington ancient egg-shaped track on the 20th.
4. Then to Charlotte for the Coca-Cola 600 miler on the 24th.
5. 300 miles at Charlotte for XFinity on the 25th.
6. 200 miles at Charlotte for the Truck Series on the 26th.
7. And 500 kilometers at Concord (just outside Charlotte) for the Cup again on the 27th -- three days after they ran SIX HUNDRED MILES. 

Oh brother.  I mean, I get the idea.  You want to cater to your base and have an aggressive restart, especially if it becomes clear that the four major sports will not relaunch (or at least not soon, as Dr. Fauci now believes there will be no major sports in 2020).  But the caveat applies:  Any relaunch MUST NOT be scuttled with one positive.  Otherwise, you're wasting your time on an epic scale! 

• For the first time in it's history -- and an indication there will be no Little League baseball this year at all!! -- the Little League World Series was called off.
• NHL:  No word yet on 2019-20 completion, but there is word that the NHL is now considering starting the 2020-21 season in December.  Hoo boy.  Good luck on that one with the second wave.    
• Olbermann:

#Thurbercast No. 36 https://t.co/A3EFblBIhS

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) May 1, 2020

• Late story coming in:

Story filed to @espn: The NBA sent a memo Thursday night advising teams not to arrange COVID-19 tests for asymptomatic players and staff, league sources told ESPN.

— Tim Bontemps (@TimBontemps) May 1, 2020

 "Joe", I think, has it right...

Season cancelled confirmed

— Joe (@Joe23521152) May 1, 2020

And football follows suit...

Few days ago, I posted that college sports was not going to like the development that Teshaun Hightower of Tulane was arrested as one of six men involved in a murder in Florida.

Well, football has it's own to worry about too... 

Jacksonville Jaguar Telvin Smith arrested today for repeated sexual encounters with a girl who is now 17.

Released on $50,003 bond, according to the ESPN report.

Second-degree felony, since he's now 29 (over 24) and the girl is 17 (16 or 17 applies in that statute).

Took last year off for his health and is now probably done.

Day 49

• It now appears that a substantial number of English Premier League players do NOT want to come back anytime soon.  This would not only be a blow to the 2019-2020 season, but, frankly, any real hope of a substantial 2020-2021 season either.  
• Belgium has joined France and the Netherlands in calling off the remainder of the 2019-2020 season.
• One of the results of Fanatics' "All In Challenge" is in:  Tom Brady's auction netted $800,000 for the relief charities.  It included dinner or a workout and tickets to Brady's first game in Tampa Bay.
• Other results:  Peyton Manning gave away golf and dinner for 10 for $525,000.
• The Rolls-Royce Phantom of Meek Mill got $320,000.
• Magic Johnson auctioned off courtside seats and a game of HORSE for $220,000.
• The Corvette that Eli Manning won for being MVP of Super Bowl XLV went for $120,000.
• The Challenge has raised over $24,000,000 for COVID-19 relief charities, and continues with over 200 items still up for grabs.

• The Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown has rescheduled this year's inductions for next July.  Perhaps an indication we are about to get no baseball -- and there are more and more people believing this is the conclusion.  
• It appears as if LeBron James is putting together a national high-school commencement event.  May 16th, on all the networks plus social media, James is going to produce a commercial-free event with celebrity commencement addresses and probably performances, etc. 
• No Olbermann tonight -- Keith took a night off for his health and his schedule.

Day 48

• Beginning to appear like they're going to at least try to relaunch NASCAR in time for Memorial Day Weekend.  Good luck, you'll need it.  
• The number of professional wrestlers turning to Twitch for another revenue stream is continuing to increase.  Let's see:  Paige, Evil Uno of AEW's Dark Order, Drew Gulak, Leva Bates (probably relaunching an old channel), Xavier Woods personally (ditto -- instead of just UpUpDownDown)...  And the vast majority of it is video-game stuff. 
• Some rumblings in England that they'd like to get the Premier League restarted -- current restrictions will be re-evaluated in about a week.
• Some other soccer updates:

1. Serie A will try to let teams begin to train May 18th.
2. The Bundesliga has all but said any 2020 games at all in Germany will be fanless.  There is thought, however, they may be about 10 days from trying games behind closed doors to complete this season (some see that as completely laughable).
3. France, on the other hand, has called off their season too -- as the Netherlands already has.
4. The MLS is suspended until at least early June. 

• Governor Newsom has begun to float a California schools plan to relaunch the 2019-20 school year -- in July! 
• Three of the major anime conventions in the country -- Fanime (with the Bay Area now under Stay At Home through May 31), Anime Expo (the largest NA convention, called off two weeks ago) and Otakon (the convention center in Washington, DC scheduled to use it will become a COVID-19 field hospital) -- have all been cancelled.
• The head of the Tokyo Organizing Committee told an event in Japan today that if the Olympic Games could not be held in Tokyo in 2021, they would not be held in Tokyo at all. Yeah, good luck. 
• Bashaud Breeland of Kansas City is in jail -- possession of marijuana or hashish, no license to drive, and open container violations.  Probably will be suspended for the marijuana.  
• Tonight's Olbermann:

Simply put, #Thurbercast No. 35 is just as much a great live view of a terrific sunset as it is me reading from Chapter 5 of “The Years With Ross.”

But...I did my besthttps://t.co/PtF8XzMfj1

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 29, 2020

The LAST THING college sports needed right now...

Tulane's Teshaun Hightower is in jail this morning, facing murder charges as one of six men involved in a murder in Stockbridge, GA earlier this month.

His attorney claims not only that Teshaun did not fire the gun (his brother did), but that it was in self-defense, according to Mark Schlabach of ESPN.

Hightower decided to enter the NBA Draft this year (at least testing the waters), but he was not projected to be taken by many drafts.  He was, however, Tulane's leading scorer.

Day 47

Last night's Olbermann:

Back live tonight at 8 PM EDT with #Thurbercast No. 34: more reading aloud of “The Years With Ross” - his book on the founding and founder of The @NewYorker. Here’s the latest episode from last night:https://t.co/0nP111jDZi

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 27, 2020

• If there is NASCAR this year, Matt Kenseth is coming out of retirement because of the firing of Kyle Larson.
• The NBA has now moved back the facilities date to May 8, and realizes that might not cover all the teams. 
• 2K has (thankfully) cancelled WWE 2K21.

Tonight's Olbermann:

Chapter 4 of “The Years With Ross” in tonight’s 34th #Thurbercast https://t.co/53DD8afoBF

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 28, 2020

• The Simulated Sports Network is back.  Took about a week and a half off after Social Distancing Super Bowl IX.  That 2007 Roster season was won by the Giants, defeating the Cowboys in the NFC title game and then the Colts (who beat the Patriots for the AFC title game) 24-21 IN OVERTIME.
• The channel is now doing something interesting.  Overnights, they are doing a Tecmo Super Bowl 2006 Roster season toward Social Distancing Super Bowl X.  During the days, they will show a 165 game simulated season of Super Baseball Simulator 1.000.
• And a periodic good word for MLBotBall, the continuing fundraising event for Meals on Wheels, starring a bunch of volunteer announcers taking the entire 162 game schedule of the 2020 MLB regular season and playing them on Twitch.
• In the season:

1. AL East:  Yankees are 2 up on the Rays.
2. AL Central:  Twins are 22-7 and 4 1/2 up on the Indians.
3. AL Worst:  Oakland, at least, has gone on a winning streak to get to 18-12, but that's 5 full games up in the division now.
4. NL East:  Nationals are a game and a half up on the Braves.
5. NL Central:  Cubs have the best record in BotBall at 22-6, 4 1/2 up on the Reds.
6. NL West:  Diamondbacks are 3 up on the Dodgers.

Day 46

• Bad news is that moron Snoop Dogg made the finals of the celebrity Madden event on ESPN.  Good news is he lost to Marquise Brown of the Baltimore Ravens.
• How the fuck can that pot-induced idiot even know where the On-Switch is on a gaming console?

----

Ahem...

• As ESPN continues to show e-sports of various kinds (they added some "regular-season" The Show: Players League yesterday -- the playoffs, involving 8 players (and no league differentiation -- quarters and semis best of 3, finals best of 5) are next weekend), here's a squinting look right now (as of does math last Tuesday) of current projections -- other than the NFL, which still wants to hold a season on schedule this Fall...

1. NBA:  Not looking good.  Probably looking minimum June at this point -- experts believe you need at least 2-4 weeks to start preparing the players again.  The NBA did, however, state that, where allowed, facilities would be able to reopen to the players starting April 24th.
2. NHL:  Kinda the same.  There is a league quarantine which is scheduled to lift this week (but probably won't).  I think it's becoming apparent that the best-case scenario might be scrapping this season and starting anew on a next season at some point, even to the point where the best-case scenario might be a 2019-2021 season, where things don't start up again until very late 2020 or early 2021!  
3. MLB: Three weeks ago, there was talk of an early May restart to Spring Training in Arizona. Estimate of Opening Day would be somewhere in the area of June 16th... and frankly, I think the only chance you have of a 2020 MLB season is without fans and, at best, a half season starting around what would be the All-Star Break.
4. MMA:  May 9, in Florida.
5. Tennis:  Current date is July 13th for real play.  An e-sports tournament for COVID-19 charities will be held this week.
6. European Soccer:  Netherlands is done.  Italy is thinking of a reopening starting now, so Serie A could POSSIBLY return.  Some word that the Champions League will become, effectively, a 2019-2021 tournament.
7. PGA:  First scheduled tournament is the Charles Schwab in Texas in June.  Probably a good trial run on that is the scheduled golf telethon of Brady/Mickelson vs. Woods/Manning Memorial Day Weekend.  First of the three majors would be the PGA in San Francisco in early August.
8. Triple Crown:  All three races have been at least postponed.  Kentucky Derby is now scheduled for Labor Day Weekend Saturday.
9. NASCAR:  They're saying May 24th.
10. Indy 500:  August 23rd.
11. Tour de France:  Late August to late September
12. Aussie Rules:  Announcement coming in about two weeks.

An interesting case study... (Part I: The Dregs of the NFL)

Since I have the time, I'm going to actually embark a project I was thinking of doing a long time ago.

It'll have at least four parts:  NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA.

In a day and age where I now think you have to take a serious look at economic contraction, I felt I would actually look at the teams in the four major sports as a concept of the bottom line, rigged or otherwise -- at least if you want to represent the games as any degree of contests...

Wins and losses.

There are many other factors you can give as far as things go, but I wanted to take the last seven seasons and find out just which teams just do not cut it.

We'll start in the NFL, listing win totals only (each team is 112 games, so 56 is .500):

New England:  12, 12, 12, 14, 13, 11, 12.  86-26.  Three Super Bowl Championships, a fourth appearance.  13-4 in the playoffs.  Last year was their first One And Done since 2010.  Last time they MISSED the playoffs was in 2008.

Kansas City:  11, 9, 11, 12, 10, 12, 12  77-35 the last seven years.  If or when we have an NFL again, they are the defending Super Bowl champions.  Five playoff wins.

Seattle:  13, 12, 10, 10, 9, 10, 11  75-37 the last seven years, two Super Bowl appearances and a Super Bowl Championship, eight playoff wins.

Pittsburgh:  8, 11, 10, 11, 13, 9, 8  70-42 regular season.  Three playoff wins

New Orleans:  11, 7, 7, 7, 11, 13, 13  37-11 the last three years, 69 wins regular season total.  Three playoff wins, and two of the most egregious rig-jobs in the recent history of the NFL to eliminate them the last two years.

Green Bay:  8, 12, 10, 10, 7, 6, "13"  66 wins regular season.  Five playoff wins, but have lost their last three NFC Championship Games.  And if you think that crappy Draft they just had was not a tell that, if we get a season this year, they KNOW it's Tom Brady and Tampa Bay this year...

Philadelphia:  10, 10, 7, 7, 13, 9, 9  65 wins regular season, four playoff wins, and a Super Bowl Championship.

Denver:  13, 12, 12, 9, 5, 6, 7  64 regular season wins, five playoff wins, two Super Bowl appearances, one Super Bowl Championship

Dallas:  8, 12, 4, 13, 9, 10, 8  64 wins regular season, two playoff wins.

Baltimore:  Had just won the previous Super Bowl before the seven years started.  8, 10, 5, 8, 9, 10, 14.  64 wins regular season, one playoff win.

Carolina:  12, 7, 15, 6, 11, 7, 5  63 wins regular season, three playoff wins, one Super Bowl appearance.

Minnesota:  5, 7, 11, 8, 13, 8, 10   62 wins regular season, two playoff wins

Indianapolis:  11, 11, 8, 8, 4, 10, 7  59 wins regular season.  Four playoff wins.

LA Rams:  7, 6, 7, 4, 11, 13, 9  57 regular season wins, two playoff wins and one Super Bowl appearance.

Arizona:  10, 11, 13, 7, 8, 3, 5  57 wins regular season, one playoff win.

Buffalo:  6, 9, 8, 7, 9, 6, 10  55 wins regular season, last playoff win was in 1995!

Houston:  2, 9, 9, 9, 4, 11, 10  54 wins regular season.  Two playoff wins.  (Only four in the team's existence, has never seen the AFC title game.)

Cincinnati:  11, 10, 12, 6, 7, 6, 2 54 wins regular season, but 21-43 in the last four years.  Last playoff win?  1991!

Atlanta:  4, 6, 8, 11, 10, 7, 7  53 wins regular season, three playoff wins, one Super Bowl appearance.

LA Chargers:  9, 9, 4, 5, 9, 12, 5.  53 wins regular season, two playoff wins.

Detroit: 7, 11, 7, 9, 9, 6, 3  52 wins regular season but only 9-23 the last two years.  Last playoff win?  1991.  They've lost in the Wild Card round in their last EIGHT playoff appearances.

San Francisco:  Lost the Super Bowl entering this period.  Then:  12, 8, 5, 2, 6, 4, 13  50 wins regular season, more wins last year than the three previous combined, and another Super Bowl appearance, with four playoff wins.

Miami:  8, 8, 6, 10, 6, 7, 5  50 regular season wins.  Last playoff win?  2000.

Tennessee:  7, 2, 3, 9, 9, 9, 9  48 regular season wins, two playoff wins -- but the trend is upward with four straight 9-7 seasons.

Chicago:  8, 5, 6, 3, 5, 12, 8  47 wins regular season, last playoff win was in 2010.

NY Jets:  8, 4, 10, 5, 5, 4, 7  43-69 the last seven years.  21-43 the last four.  Last playoff win was in 2010.

Raiders:  4, 3, 7, 12, 6, 4, 7  43-69 the last seven years.  17-31 the last three, 11-21 under Chuckie.  Last playoff win was the 2002-03 AFC Championship.

NY Giants:  7, 6, 6, 11, 3, 5, 4  12-36 the last three years, only one more win in those three years combined than in 2016!  42-70 for the seven years.  Last playoff win was 2011-12's Super Bowl.

Washington:  3, 4, 9, 8, 7, 7, 3  41-71 the last seven years.  Last playoff win:  2005.

Tampa Bay:  4, 2, 6, 9, 5, 5, 7  38-74 regular season.  Last playoff win was the Super Bowl over the Raiders.  And now, if you don't get the idea this Brady to Tampa thing might not literally be "Save The NFL In Florida!!!!"...

Jacksonville:  4, 3, 5, 3, 10, 5, 6  36-76 regular season, two playoff wins to get to the AFC title game in 2017.

Cleveland:  4, 7, 3, 1, 0, 7, 6  28-84 the last seven years.  Their last playoff APPEARANCE was in 2002, their last playoff win was in 1995!  Last winning season was in 2007.

------------------------------

So what do we have, if you wanted candidates for contraction:

Cleveland and some subset of the Florida teams including Jacksonville appear nearly locks.  Miami would have SOME tradition, but there is very real question as to the future of professional sports in the state of Florida at large before this virus fucked up everything.

Looking at these numbers, one has to start wondering if Brady to Tampa might also be the NFL saying that the NFL has to be saved in the state of Florida, and they might need a blatant pump-job for the next season (if we get it!! -- and if we don't, there's nothing to say Brady can make it back at 44!!!) to get it done.

From there, it's a bunch of tradition with the Raiders (who I think are a question if the new stadium in Las Vegas doesn't take!), the Giants, Jets, and Bears (who probably would be safe enough on legacy...

Detroit and the Chargers probably would also be on the chopping block.  San Francisco's 13-3 last year probably saved them consideration on my list as well.

But my list of candidates for the chop, if we take this with some degree of reasonability:

• Cleveland
• At least Jacksonville
• Possibly Miami and Tampa Bay as well
• Las Vegas if the stadium doesn't take
• Washington if they can't get the team some competent ownership
• Detroit
• LA Chargers

More later.

Day 45

• Chris Jericho's schedule went a little wonky today.  No Saturday Night Special tonight -- will be back next week.  He sends his regards.
• I'm not sure if I posted last week's, so here it is:

• Olbermann:

#Thurbercast No. 32 https://t.co/Kzb9rxOOM9

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 26, 2020

• Scary news from LA earlier in the week as Vin Scully took a fall and was hospitalized.
• Great news tonight, though!!!

...”I am so eternally grateful for their help and selfless service. I’m home resting comfortably with my wife and we are both eagerly awaiting the Time for Dodger Baseball!”

— Los Angeles Dodgers (@Dodgers) April 26, 2020

• Another piece of good news:  The NFL Draft was this weekend -- and much of it was turned into a three-day telethon for various COVID-19 relief chartities.  At the end of the Draft, Roger Goodell (who WAS virtually booed at his first appearance on the show -- ha ha!!) announced that private and NFL Family contributions to COVID-19 relief charities had already exceeded $100,000,000.
• Perhaps the fact that the NFL Draft was the first meaningful sporting event in weeks led the NFL Draft to record viewership.  Over 15,600,000 people watched Round 1 on the ESPN family of networks.  Even 8,200,000 watched Round 2 and 3 Friday night!  (Sports Media Watch)

Day 44

Starting with a couple pieces of bad news:

• The top Dutch soccer league, the Eredivisie, has been called off for the season, no champion.
• The President of the University of Arizona does not see any way college football happens this Fall.
• The Second Life Fantasy Faire has pretty much raised it's first $10,000 already.
• The cast of Parks and Recreation is reuniting for a special charity episode, based on social distancing, etc.  It will also double as a fundraiser for Feeding America and it's COVID-19 initiatives -- and with various matching donation incentives, they want to raise a million dollars on April 30th. 
• Olbermann: 

It’s #Thurbercast No. 31: more of his biography of the founder of The @NewYorker Harold Ross, focusing on the dream of artists (like my dad) to get their drawings in the magazinehttps://t.co/giTIwCFv8c

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 25, 2020

Day 43 -- not sure there's much here anyway

• Oh, something I missed.

Twitch, with Major League Baseball, has been airing an MLB: The Show Players League.

One player from each team in the major leagues plays against other teams -- I believe it's a 30 game schedule, with the top two teams in each league playing off in a 3-game series.  The winners of those play off in a 5-game series for $25,000 for charity.

Each player gets $5,000 for participating.

• Olbermann: 

#Thurbercast No. 30 as we continue the reading of his biography of the founder of The @NewYorker in “The Years With Ross”https://t.co/9R2ilV4O3s

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 24, 2020

• And something I'd be remiss in doing, even though this is an annual event anyway.  Second Life is holding it's annual American Cancer Society Fantasy Faire, one of the largest events (if not THE largest) in it's virtual Relay For Life.  Fantasy-themed events, role-playing, a 24-hour music channel including live DJ's, over 250 Second Life-item vendors, and much more.  Now through May 10th.

Day 42 -- SIX WEEKS NOW?

I guess.  And I am, again, an Olbermann behind:

#Thurbercast returns live tonight at 8 PM EDT as we begin his book “The Years With Ross”

File And Forget” - Thurber’s bureaucratic battle with his publishers, intent on sending him 36 copies of “Grandma Was A Nudist” in #Thurbercast No. 28.https://t.co/Da3whgeGFl

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 22, 2020

• Mayor of Las Vegas has had enough of the shutdown.  All fine and good.  I get the conception that Vegas is basically completely kaput in a few weeks or a couple of months if not reopened.  But if the virus actually gets to completely dictate the timeline, Vegas is done -- and so is about 2/3 of the US population, over the course of time.  
• Evidence?  Unemployment figures for Southern California:  An admitted unemployment rate of THIRTY-ONE PERCENT.  (Meaning that about a quarter of all jobs in this state have been, minimum, put on hold.)
• Pending the PGA Tour's approval, we apparently are going to have "The Match" II.  Tiger Woods vs. Phil Mickelson, with partners Peyton Manning (for Tiger) and Tom Brady (for Phil).  Undisclosed location, no fans, effectively the match is a telethon for coronavirus relief efforts.  Proposed for Memorial Day Weekend on TNT. 

And I know it's 4 AM Thursday, but here's Wednesday night's Olbermann to get caught up:

#Thurbercast No. 29 commences the reading of his book “The Years With Ross” - his loving, hilarious and possibly hyperbolized portrait of the founder of The @NewYorker, Harold Ross. Here’s Chapter 1:https://t.co/5cwmD04NOC

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 23, 2020

Yep, we knew MLB loved them some Astros and Red Sox, especially at the expense of the Dodgers...

The consummation of the rig-job was today's "punishments"...

• Red Sox video replay person banned one year.
• Loss of a second-round pick.
• Alex Cora banned a year as well -- but for what he did in HOUSTON, NOTHING for what happened in Boston.

If that isn't INCONTROVERTIBLE EVIDENCE of the Office of the Commissioner of Baseball openly desiring to take baseball backwards 60 years to a regional, east of the Mississippi sport, I don't know what to tell you.

We're six weeks in, and it's increasingly becoming evident we're Wile E. Coyote...

The tempest is beginning to roil.

We have an increasing number of people -- both thugs, gang-bangers, and drug dealers and addicts on the one side and Libertarians and "Let Them All Die!" Republicans on the other -- who are trying people's patience.

First, it was the Corona Parties and Spring Breakers and all of that -- now, many of them have been exposed and now have had the virus.

And then we get the "Open My Goddamn State NOW!" protests.

It's time for some reality.  It really is.

1.  This is a decidedly First World virus.

Most viruses tend to propagate because of some degree of Third World uncleanliness -- or a point at which the First World breaks down into at least temporary state of such.

This virus (and this is one of the reasons sports shut down so completely and so quickly!) is explosively contagious and travel tends to exacerbate it.

There is a very real chance, as a result, that a third or more of this country actually has had it.  It is coming out, more and more, that the number of cases is probably two orders of magnitude lower than reality.

Why?

2.  Because it's clear that any degree of reality regarding not only number of cases, but number of killed by the virus, probably scares people even worse.

And I believe this is about the extent of any real "conspiracy" on the question.

I don't think I can understate the fear a lot of people ARE in.  I have had to take very real stock that there is more than a decent shot I don't see 2021.

And I think a lot of people other than Debbie Gibson fans would like to see that happen for stealing three decades of food down my piehole.

But the fact is that I do believe that the number of deaths is vastly underreported as well.

3.  The protestors on the Right want 2-3-4% of this country deceased due to the virus.

I read a couple of highly-bigoted right-wing websites.

At least one of them wants to see the diabetic and fat and otherwise useless killed, cooked, and EATEN.  (I'm looking right at you, Karl Denninger!)

I don't think it is an exaggeration to say that a lot of people (see above comment) would like to see 2-3-4% of the entire US population culled due to the virus' first wave.

And then another similar percentage with the second, until only those "worthy" remain.

4.  On the other side of the equation, drug-filled YOLO Culture is threatening to seize up urban, suburban, and exurban America.

You are seeing a bunch of unemployables (even if they were employed) lounging out, smoking pot, doing meth, getting blasted, and acting stupid.

And the police are largely doing...  NOTHING.

At some point, that's going to translate into far bolder moves -- probably in the near future...

5a.  We have at least another six weeks of at-home lockdowns coming, largely as a result of those who refuse.

5b.  We probably have about a month after that before an All-Stop Condition hits.

5c.  The entire point of this Safer At Home/Shelter In Place is not YOU not getting it, but keeping it from vulnerable populations.

But if we combine 4 and 5c, it comes to a disturbing conclusion.

5d.  Many of these YOLO Culture types are probably aiming to off their parents or grandparents for some degree of money.

Especially now with at least one region of the country (Southern California) with an admitted unemployment rate of 31%!!!

But if someone doesn't slap some sense (from King Covfefe on down!) into this situation soon, this is going to be a hot-lead filled summer.

Why?

6.  This virus is "too good".  This was created somewhere to be loosed on somebody.  But the lab in China probably had someone too lazy and it got out there first.

And, hence...

7.  There is no standing vaccine for coronavirus/the common cold.  Any real thought there will be one for COVID-19 needs to start there.  Unless you can actually find that "cure for the common cold", a vaccine ain't happening.

-----

Now, onto sports, etc.

1.  There will be social distancing.  PERMANENT social distancing.

The fact is that what probably is going to happen is that this is going to cull out any business who can't have people standing six feet apart.

It's probably also going to be the functional end of not only "Eating Out", but....

2.  Any real hope that we feasibly get back to 18,000 fans for concerts or basketball, much less 60-100,000 for football, is probably a pipe-dream fantasy at best.

If you need any evidence of that, please look at the fact that MAYBE a third of people are going to feel comfortable going out to events once this all is over...

And that not only has to deal with a second wave, but it also has to deal with the belief that they're not going to be able to come up with a meaningful vaccine.

3.  Any restart of the economy has to take into account both 5a and 5b of the first set of things and 1 and 2 of this set.

Too much longer, and the infrastructure WILL FAIL.

At the same time, it's clear we will get a bad second wave.

If we let the lockdowns go until a vaccine is tried, chances are the infrastructure fails (I'm putting a date of that of around July 4, 2020) and we get people believing that even some of the employed are now "useless eaters".

4.  IndyCar and NASCAR are done, IMHO.  Any car racing in this country will either be local or virtual.

Part of the reason is that I believe they are very niche sports.

The rest is the amount of money (not only sponsor, but fan) needed to keep the machine going.

5. The NHL and NBA will be forced to cancel their 2019-20 seasons to have any real chance of having a 2020-21 season -- and that's if a second wave doesn't stunt the latter.  If it does, very real chance the NHL does not survive with some of the Southern teams.

6.  Major League Baseball may TRY a half-season starting in July and under very controlled conditions.  If one positive test kills it, don't bother trying.

7.  I think a lot of people, if they had their way, would want the NFL to be the relaunch next fall.  I don't think we can wait that long -- hence, probably a metered restart of sports, starting with individual sports like golf in June?

In short, stay tuned.

Day 41

• Blame the Final Fantasy VII Remake (and I did keep my promise not to buy it -- my nephew Eddie -- thank you! -- provided some safer-at-home entertainment!), but I am behind in posting Olbermann for last night...

#Thurbercast No. 28 features his “File And Forget,” epic exchange of letters with a publisher intent on sending him 36 copies of “Grandma Was A Nudist.”

It’s also profoundly interrupted by my youngest dog, who does. Not. Like. When. The. Heat. Comes. Up.https://t.co/3u5qf6FyB4

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 21, 2020

• It appears any launch of Minor League Baseball will only have 120 teams left in the entire system.  Sounds like Manfred's goal to gut the minor leagues has succeeded, and the deal will be cut tomorrow, per Olbermann.
• The XFL Commissioner Oliver Luck has sued Vince McMahon for wrongful termination.  What the fuck?  And here's the other reason that a lot of potential lawsuits might not succeed:  The XFL wasn't doing that badly before this whole new reality hit the table!  It COULD HAVE survived.
• Not the only problem Vince is having these days. An unnamed WWE employee associated with the filming of one or more of the weekly shows has said he wants the county in which the WWE Performance Center -- where all WWE wrestling programming is being taped at this point -- to be forced to stop all filming, due to fears that the coronavirus is actually circulating. The WWE denies the claim and is probably going to fire the person for trying to put this through the media and the public, rather than HR. 
• Probably the last thing people need to worry about right now, with all the situations -- so file this one away if there's an NFL season this year...  But are they beginning to actually think of giving Tampa Bay a championship?  Tampa Bay just traded for (current WWE 24/7 champion!) Rob Gronkowski to go with Brady. 
• The cover athlete of Madden 21 has been revealed:  Baltimore's Lavar Jackson.

Day 40

• The 2020 World Series of Poker has been postponed until at least the Fall.

Olbermann last night, since I forgot:

Here’s last night’s latest #Thurbercast 27th edition with “The Topaz Cufflinks Mystery” and some of Thurber’s obsession with the language and its components in “The Tyranny Of Trivia”https://t.co/AyicJbgNS9

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 20, 2020

• There is actually a proposal being floated that any MLB this season is SEVEN INNING GAMES -- at least for doubleheaders.  Now watch them try to make that permanent.  
• Also being floated:  All games at Arizona spring training sites, a December World Series, and a home-run derby to decide any games still tied after nine innings.  Here we go with the experiment!
  

And another glorious Riot-ing from Riot Games...

North American Spring Split Grand Final going on right now, such as it is, with a six-win superior team in Cloud 9 just waiting for whoever got served up.

But I don't think anyone got this idea....

Since the players are at home, the game decided, at least for Game 1, to stream their faces while playing.  Except Riot Games didn't take into account about a five minute delay in the game stream leading to THIS:

bruh #LCS pic.twitter.com/wvNJRmfUtR

— Evil Jacob Wolf (@JacobWoIf) April 19, 2020

Cloud 9 getting up from their computers after they won Game 1, about five minutes before we actually saw it on the game feed!

Which leaves only one of two possibilities -- a fix, or a stream lag situation.

Nice look, Riot -- and ESPN2 caught the whole thing! Have fun eep, oop, awk, and ork-ing your way out of THAT ONE!

Day 39: jordon-jocking intensifies...

• ESPN, tonight, is premiering "The Last Dance", a project surrounding the final rigged championship of the Chicago Bulls.

And ESPN has just overloaded the jordon-jocking.

Look, if you want to come out and say there's no NBA without jordon, then please do so and expose your biases.

The fact is, I could probably (and almost certainly WILL) have multiple posts on here about what his impact actually was (TLDR version:  Corporate era of sports, acceptance of rigging, influence of the media on who hits and who doesn't, etc.).

But the fact is this jordon-jocking during this coronavirus seems to indicate ESPN is trying to reassert influence in what well might be it's dying days.

• If a report from Mexico is to be believed, we may be headed for a single North American soccer league between at least the MLS and Liga MX.

In an eye-turning interview, Alejandro Irarragorri of Atlas basically says the MLS is in better financial shape (HOW???) than Liga MX, and the bulk of the fans of the latter are actually in the US (THAT makes sense because of how the USMNT is usually viewed in most qualifiers, even at home!).

And, as such, Irarragorri is saying we may well need to be at the day where the two leagues simply merge.

This comes on the heels that Liga MX has suspended promotion and relegation for the next five years, probably effectively dooming a number of second-tier clubs in Mexico.

• The next big ESPN project for e-sports?  Madden Celebrity Tournament.  All next week on ESPN digital platforms.

Day 38

• The major event today is another major at-home concert event:  "One World: Together At Home" -- basically on most major social media outlets, etc.
• ESPN is doing another classic boxing day.
• Here's Chris Jericho, on the eve of Saturday Night Special #4, with a two-hour Saturday Night Special, special guest Kevin Smith, last week: 

Day 37

• San Diego Comic Con is the latest casualty of all of this.  Have to wonder if anything like that can ever be pulled off again.  
• In what probably is a setback for thinking we get an NFL season this year, two NFL players, including Von Miller, have tested positive for the virus.  Any continuance of ANY sports is going to be contingent that one positive test doesn't fell the whole thing.  
• The PGA Tour announced a schedule beginning in June yesterday.  We'll see about that.  
• CRDQ, an at-home event from the Games Done Quick people for Direct Relief, is this weekend.
• The mega-concert event with Lady Gaga, etc., is tomorrow night.
• As may be another Chris Jericho Saturday Night Special.
• Olbermann: 

#Thurbercast No. 26 is “Cornell Night”: my tweet from the president Taiwan (@iingwen Cornell Lae ‘80), Thurber’s profile of E.B. White (Cornell ‘21) and the day I almost took a swing at Bill Maher (Cornell ‘78)https://t.co/FCfXLhpN0U

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 18, 2020

One of the few levels of Tweets which might merit separate consideration on this blog...

Rather normal day around here until Brian retweets this...

The NFL is scripted but they make us sign something so we can’t go into detail... Tired of holding back.. Who want the full story ..

— Benny Cunningham (@BennyCunningham) April 16, 2020

Brian has reached out.  We'll see about any progress on that end.

Six years in the NFL, according to Pro Football Reference -- four with the Rams, two with the Bears.  Nothing out of 2019.  Sounds like he's out of the league and pissed.

Stay tuned.

EDIT TO ADD BASICALLY IMMEDIATELY:  And, just as I post this, Brian gets back to me -- he doesn't think this is going to go anywhere.

Pretty sure it's nonsense. He looks like he's promoting some clothing line and used the tweet to grab attention.

— Brian Tuohy (@TheFixIsInTuohy) April 16, 2020

Day 36

• Not coronavirus -- he had been suffering a long health battle -- but we just lost Howard Finkel, iconing WWE announcer.
• Olbermann: 

#Thurbercast No. 25 tonight: Thurber’s portrait of his eccentric, practical jokester of a mother, “Lavender With A Difference.”https://t.co/1m3LZ5yxUw

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 17, 2020

Day 35: And Vince laughs...

• So a couple days after you literally pull an Animal Farm and get your business declared essential...
• Vince McMahon has fired, as a massive cost-cutting move, no less than 17 wrestlers, at least one referee, at least one announcer, and a slew of backstage producers.
• And, when you look at it as a wrestling fan, a lot of these people needed to go.

1. Drake Maverick was a low-level joke character in the 24/7 storyline.
2. Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder.  No real surprise about these two either.  Joke/jobber level tag team who was definitely well past shelf life.
3. Anderson and Gallows.  Brought in in that NJPW talent raid which got them AJ Styles and Shinsuke Nakamura -- and done absolutely NOTHING with.
4. Heath Slater.  Probably the ultimate joke/jobber guy on Raw or Smackdown.
5. Primo and Epico.  Hadn't been off house shows in YEARS.
6. Mike and Maria Kanellis.  The cuckolding storyline which ended in the lap of Bobby Lashley started HERE.
7. Lio Rush had gotten some heat in the back and was thrown off TV for a while, so no big loss there.
8. About the one real loss in the group, wrestler-wise, is Rusev.  Another part of that cuckolding story, it was clear that Vince had little in mind for the Bulgarian Brute and he was not long for the company.
9. And then the other real wrestler loss was Kairi Sane, who had just wrapped a run as half the women's tag team champions, but had been injured for a good part of that run.
10. And then the producers.  In short, basically who's left???  Kurt Angle was working as a producer, but pretty much almost all the name producers on the mid-level or the like were released today en masse...

Vince McMahon is an asshole, because it's clear this day should've come in a far more job-friendly environment than today's.  The fact is, this guy had most of the wrestlers on this list to prevent them (especially the likes of Rusev or Sane) getting over in Tony Khan's AEW.

But to do this NOW, especially after you pull the Animal Farm "more equal than others" bullshit days ago to get your shows back to live status...

• Olbermann: 

Thurber’s bitter satire of people who can’t tell the difference between a genius and a con man, “Something To Say,” plus the fable “The Birds And Thr Foxes” highlight tonight’s 24th #Thurbercast https://t.co/ENM88w5Flg

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 16, 2020

• US Soccer has terminated it's youth academy.
• Dr. Fauci says that any continuation of sports will be fanless.  Duh.  

---


Couple of sports anniversaries today:

35 years since the first round of all-time -- part of the three-round classic that was Hearns-Hagler.

55 years since the famous "Havlicek stole the ball!" call...

https://t.co/vjlHqD8VG0. 55 years ago today one of the greatest calls in sports history. I was lucky to have Johnny Most teach me how to broadcast basketball. #havlicekstoletheball pic.twitter.com/xW1SiALLeL

— Steve Holman (@RealVoiceofHawk) April 15, 2020

Day 34: Larson gone and now FIRED.

• Kyle Larson was fired today by Chip Ganassi Racing.

Good.  There's one problem with this, though.  I think it's going to become clear he's not alone.

NASCAR's fanbase is inherently Southern, White, male, racist, and sexist.

I think this is another example of how e-sports are out of control, but also another example of how I do not believe auto racing in general, nor NASCAR in particular, survives this.

• Olbermann:

#Thurbercast 23 https://t.co/3IlDWSHzpm

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 15, 2020

• Social Distancing Super Bowl VIII is now in the books.  Another 1991 roster shuffle year in the books.  Raiders beat the Dolphins 27-24 to face the Rams, who got all the way through the wildcards to beat the Lions 38-28, then beat the Raiders 42-24 for Social Distancing Super Bowl VIII.  And as I take a look at the rosters, I figure out why -- not Ken O'Brien or Jim McMahon at quarterback -- the Rams drew Bo, and anyone who's seen Bo in Tecmo Super Bowl knows he's effectively God Stats.  Averaged almost 22 yards a rush in the Super Bowl.
• And their ninth season, a 2007 roster/stats season, has started on their Twitch channel.
• Dr. Ezekiel Emmanuel, a health expert in the Obama Administration, does not believe we will have safe concerts or large scale sporting events... until at least Fall 2021.
• And the first two Division I college sports programs to be lost to the new reality (if we still have college sports by the time this is all over) have been made public:  University of Cincinnati has dropped mens' soccer.  Old Dominion has dropped wrestling. 
• WWE Animal Farm Update:  Linda McMahon Public Action Committee for Trump poured $18.5 million into the state of Florida on April 9, one day before the governor of state declared WWE's pig more equal than others on the Animal Farm that is in the state of Florida.  (Cageside Seats, through Stephanie Coueignoux, an Emmy-award winning investigative journalist in Orlando.)

• And a MAJOR fundraising effort:  Celebrities (and some of these almost-certainly top-dollar stuff), the ALL IN CHALLENGE.  Fanatics is running this fundraiser for various relief organizations, including Meals on Wheels

Here are some examples:

1. A day with Ryan Seacrest, and everything he does.  (Raffle, $10 entry)
2. Kevin Hart will put you in his next movie (Raffle, $10 entry).
3. Meek Mill is auctioning off a 2019 Rolls-Royce Phantom (opening bid is only $200,000!)
4. Magic Johnson is auctioning off courtside seats with him for a Lakers game (what year???) and a game of HORSE with him (if you got the $50,000 to start the bidding on THAT!)
5. Justin Beiber will fly to the winner's house and sing "One Less Lonely Girl". (Raffle, $10 entry)
6. Mark Cuban will actually sign you to a one-day contract with the Dallas Mavericks (Raffle, $10 entry)
7. You get to throw out the first pitch at a game in the next World Series (Raffle, $10 entry)
8. You get to not only call a play at an Eagles preseason game, you get to design it!  (Raffle, $10 entry)
9. ADDED TO THE LIST BECAUSE I CAN 1:55 AM PDT 4/15:  The Undertaker is auctioning off dinner and one of his ring-worn coats in an auction for this effort.  (Bid as of about this time was $4,700.)

And many many more -- the donation limit on the raffles is $10,000 per raffle to allow a chance for anyone to have a feasible shot at some of the super-prize raffles.

Day 33: Starting With: Kyle, how could be so stupid?

• Kyle Larson has been banned.

Racial slur during the iRacing race, and he's GONE.  Suspended indefinitely by NASCAR, and it looks like his team is going to drop him.

Da FUCK, Kyle??  Look, there's no secret that there's all kinds of this conduct in gaming, but you HAVE TO know better.  

• In more somber news, Karl Anthony-Towns of the Timberwolves has lost his mother to this damn virus.
• The XFL officially folded today, filing bankruptcy.
• I don't think you need to read too many tea leaves to see how this went down:  The reason the WWE can now go live...  Because some animals are more equal than others -- WWE has been declared an essential business.  Pardon me while I puke. 
• And Olbermann, with a baseball theme tonight:

Tonight’s #Thurbercast #22. His 1941 baseball story “You Could Look It Up” which may - or may not - have presaged the actual use of a 43-inch tall pinch-hitter in a Major League Baseball game a decade laterhttps://t.co/LIT3HbUfot

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 14, 2020

• Which reminds me to give a continuing shout-out to MLBotball, a volunteer group of baseball fans simming the entire 2020 MLB regular season in real time on MLB The Show 20.  Twitch channel and website. 
• Another Saturday event for this Saturday:  Laughter Heals Gaming, a positivity-based gaming team, is putting together a Twitch event 5-8 PM Pacific on the 18th -- one of the three hosts is Georgia van Cuylenburg, the voice of Vanille in the Final Fantasy XIII series...

Going to be an awesome night of comedy and gaming! @thelovemaster @adamferrara @BRUCEJINGLES @DonFriesenComic @TheZaraMizrahi @AlonzoBodden @benthemorrison @GeorgiaVanC @ReemEdan
April 18th 5PM PST. https://t.co/lcBiaXDr7z pic.twitter.com/g1Y3WQWk38

— Laughter Heals Gaming (@LHGamers) April 13, 2020

Day 32 Olbermann

Tonight’s 22nd #Thurbercast features...full screen graphics!

(Well, me holding up Thurber’s drawings to the camera, to illustrate his story about his illustrations: “The Lady On The Bookcase”)https://t.co/BOY6e8InpB

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 13, 2020

Day 31...

• ESPN has the semis and finals of the NBA 2K Tournament tonight.  Two Suns and two Clippers are left.
• And Devin Booker has defeated Deandre Ayton two games to none to win the championship of the ESPN NBA 2K tournament.  Booker wins a $100,000 charity donation from 2K, the NBA, and the NBPA to the charity of his choice.
• Chris Jericho is holding his third "Saturday Night Special" tonight on Facebook.  Here's him posting the second one to his YouTube account:

• There IS a current estimated relaunch date of the NBA, at least according to ESPN.  They're looking at June 14th.  Probably would mean fanless, almost certainly would mean some degree of training camp by Memorial Day, and a playoffs into August.
• NFL and college football are still planning a go as scheduled -- and it's probably that which may well determine whether any fabric of this society survives the summer at all...
• Baseball and hockey are both currently estimated to start right about the same week the NBA relaunches, mid-June.  Good luck, you will need it.  As I said, however, I do believe the very survival of at least hockey probably depends on it!
• The current schedule literally runs the US Open tennis tournament (as scheduled) back to back with the French Open.  Gee, you think this might be one reason tennis authorities are unhappy with the French?
• Sounds like most of the rest of it is late May into June.  Probably meaning some degree of economic relaunch within a month.  But if Olbermann is right and these projections are wrong...
• Uh oh for WWE... An on-screen non-roster talent has tested positive for the coronavirus. It was probably due to meeting with some friends in the healthcare industry in late March, after most of the pre-Mania stuff was taped. The one real question is whether this person (referee, announcer, etc.) had any contact with the roster after this meeting and before the positive test. That could determine whether WWE goes onward at this point -- they're trying to skirt regulations as best they can to continue Raw and Smackdown, believing mass-taping several weeks in advance might be in violation of their TV contracts with FOX and USA.
• It appears that the talent has successfully recovered and been clear of the virus. The above question still stands.
• And in a sign the shit might still be hitting the fan -- word today that Boston University may be putting plans in place to have no FALL SEMESTER either.  People better start confronting the very real chance the entire on-site educational system may no longer be supportable -- financially, if by no other means of canning it.
• Olbermann's back after a one-night allergy absence:

The #Thurbercast is back. Tonight’s 21st episode includes his epic story of a guide for English travelers in France, read as if it were a story of disaster and crisis: “There’s No Place Like Home.”https://t.co/qnB4B7IZTa

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 12, 2020

One month in, Part Two: The fact is, the bullshit has to stop. The people refusing to social distance have to be brought to comply.

I've been sitting here for the better part of the month in grave frustration.

If we had gotten these especially twenty-nothing types on board with this, there'd be a good chance we could flatten the curve a bit and keep a lid on this and figure out how to get things started (to enough of an extent to prevent riots -- getting any kind of mass gatherings back at any time may be far too much an ask for anybody for at least another 12-18 MONTHS) by the end of the first half of the year.

I forgot that, both locally and nationally, we seem to have quite the number of people in this country who openly desire the entire thing to break down and the cities to go free-fire.

Now, in my locality, you can't even take a bus or do any business in the city at all without sufficient face-covering.  And yet, we still have a bunch of drug-addled LOSERS who are willing to "YOLO" their way through this without social distancing, face covering, or any kind of precaution whatsoever.

I mean, if I get it, am I a goner?  It's a roll of the dice, and I probably have an increased chance than most, given that I'm over 50, about 300 pounds, and some untreated co-morbidities.  I had a bit of a sick run late last year-early this year with what I thought was an viral intestinal situation I'd never had, plus bronchitis later.

But it almost seems like a lot of these people would love Terrible Trump's next ratings bonanza to be "The Running Man" or "The Hunger Games" or something to that effect.

And now that the "snitching" is in vogue, the same types are coming out with "FREEDOM! LIBERTY!  FUCK YOU I'M EATING!!!"

It's come to enforcement, people.  We need to get these people in line before they win everything and ALL OF US lose everything.  Not just one person, one home, one street, but the whole damn country.

As it is, just to keep it to sports:

• I believe auto racing is now a thing of the past.  We might still have the iRacing circuits, but I cannot see NASCAR nor Indy surviving one full lost year, if not two or more, until the fans can come back with a vaccine and the comfort to show up.
• The NHL is probably a goner south of the US-Canada border in many of the moribund cities in which they tried to shove the NHL where it didn't work.  You could really see a move to bring more professional hockey back north of the border.
• There was already talk of a "Premier Golf Tour" in the weeks leading up to all this -- but who's going to have the sponsorship money, especially with no galleries for the foreseeable even if they start in June, to keep the PGA Tour as you knew it along.
• And don't think the NBA, NFL, and Major League Baseball are immune.  There are franchises in all of those leagues which could use to be pared.

But the fact of the matter is, it comes back down to the point where these 20-nothing, 30-nothing drug-addled punks need to be brought to heed before they destroy the rest of the situation for all of the rest of us.

Day 30 Updates, Part 2 probably coming tonight of my first-month post...

• The XFL has failed.  All staff laid off, no plans for 2021.  Not, at this point, that I think it functionally matters.  As you saw in that survey I posted about last night/early this morning, half of those polled now believe we get no sports at all for the rest of the calendar year.
• He's not the only one out of a job today.  Grant Wahl was fired today from Sports Illustrated for criticisms of pay cuts because of the coronavirus.  There are going to be a lot of people out of a job in sports and sports media over the next few months, especially if the length of time out is going to be as long as some of us think it is.  (MSN)
• Major League Baseball is getting in the e-sports kick -- a league of MLB: The Show involving one player from each of the 30 teams.
• Here's a call-back from the old 1970's NBA on CBS broadcasts:  ESPN is putting on a HORSE tournament -- socially-distanced (probably meaning the players have to have some personal access to a personal court or section thereof at their house of something!)  First round Sunday, semifinals and finals on Friday.  Eight-man tournament.  (Matchups are here.) 
• And Sunday, a marathon of National Spelling Bees on ESPN from 9 AM to 4 PM Pacific.
• In about the closest thing we have to sports, as illegal and irresponsible, etc. as it is, a group of IDIOTS decided to use the fact that the traffic was far less to break, perhaps once and for all, the classic Cannonball Run from Los Angeles to New York -- and took the record down to just 26 hours and 38 minutes. 
• Social Distancing Super Bowl VII is in the books from the Simulated Sports Network.  Unlike the previous six, they decided to take the 1991 rosters and jumble them.  As a result, Boomer Esiason, Jerry Rice, Thurman Thomas and Richard Dent's Detroit Lions stopped Steve Young's Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the NFC title game 34-27 when Roger Craig was stopped 1 yard short of a tying touchdown.  The AFC title went to Cincinnati, who shitcanned Denver 42-0.
• And Detroit used a timely block of an extra point with 1:15 to go to win over Cincinnati 21-13.
• Another 1991 roster-jumble season has just begun on their Twitch channel.

We're now a month in as of Friday, and it doesn't look good in any respect. (Part One)

This will probably be an ongoing blog post of several thoughts I have, but they all kind of dovetail into the same thing:

We're a month into this, and I think it's becoming clearer by the passing moment we are heading into the teeth of a biblical tragedy.

• I'll start with a Seton Hall poll which indicates you can pretty much forget about any games with fans in 2020 at all, and that about half of the respondents believe there will be no sports at all in 2020.  (ESPN)

762 respondents in the poll.  72% will not attend games anymore without a vaccine.

That's basically at least through Opening Day 2021 out.

Though about the same number (actually 76%) would watch games without fans and be as enthusiastic, 46% believe there will be no sports at all for the rest of the calendar year.

• And that's nothing compared to what a Santa Clara official said.

This will be a shock for sports fans who haven’t been paying attention:

Executive Officer of Santa Clara County CA says there “won’t be any sports games until at least Thanksgiving, and we’d be lucky to have them by Thanksgiving.”https://t.co/d82NxFuyx7

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 10, 2020

First, I think we've already lost NASCAR (and Indy).  Any future "racing league" in this country WILL be virtual-only.

I think neck and neck for next to go (and, if that 46% and the officials in Santa Clara are right, this will happen) are the PGA Tour and the NHL.  You could have the latter survive as a Canadian institution, but the biggest problem here is one of seasonality.  If this thing becomes a recurring problem (as many expect it will), your best hope for a restart is definitely tied into a vaccine, and that's 12-18 months -- so are we talking Opening Day 2021, or the start of the 2021-2022 NFL season?

And then how the Hell do you get that far without losing the nation?  I think you're going to have a very difficult time (and this is even WITH a SECOND $1,200 subsidy for EVERYBODY like the one going out next week) getting past about June, July 4th at the abject latest -- and I believe there are a significant number of losers in this country (as I will go into in Part 2 later Friday) who are openly machinating a riot situation, partially by their refusal to abide by the social distancing and partially because they're polishing their guns for the elimination of whatever "others" end up in their crosshairs.

I believe we are heading, rapidly, to the point where tens of millions get killed in a cascading series of starvations, riots, and loss of the grid.  Basically, I believe we do get, by July 4, one of the three All-Stop Conditions I've been talking about:

• Power and or Internet Down permanently
• Lone Wolves/Small groups set it off and it cascades.
• Loss of the Supply Lines

I get that people want to believe we're going to get some of this back, but it may have to come back far sooner than anyone expects or we lose it all long before some of these predictions.  I said to Olbermann a month ago that I felt we were going 12-18 months without.

Question:  What survives that long and how?  And that's sports leagues, sports networks, and the country, society, and economy at large...

Day 29 Olbermann

Tonight’s 20th anniversary of the live reading-aloud #Thurbercast (meaning we’ve done 20 of them) features “The Uprising Of The Animals” and “Dogs I Have Scratched”https://t.co/3zRWCvoC6A

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 10, 2020

----

I guess one other thing:

• UFC's done for the foreseeable.  ESPN stepped in and told Dana to knock it off with the "private island" stuff.

Day 28, really late...

• Olbermann:

Last night’s 19th #Thurbercast includes “I Like Dogs” and “Help! Help! Another Classificationization.”

Also, the guy reading it has three dogs sitting on his lap. https://t.co/EqTMNJsnQi

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 9, 2020

• Not really much else on any end to do at this point...  They did the celebrity 20th Anniversary of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" for the first Wednesday night of eight -- with phone players playing an online app trivia game for a share of $125,000.  The show will air 10 PM Eastern and Pacific, with the app game coming after the Eastern airing.

Day 27

Start with at least three major sports updates:

• The UFC, in Dana White's continuing saga of trying to hold his sport, is actually finding a PRIVATE ISLAND somewhere to hold fights.  This is almost getting to some of the snuff literature (including some movies like "The Condemned") I've been hearing about.
• Major League Baseball is considering some degree of a quarantined league in Arizona this year to try to get games in.
• The NFL, should there be a training camp, is doing an all-Los Angeles "Hard Knocks" -- BOTH LA teams, in the shadow of the opening of SoFi Stadium. 

------

Stuff to do:

• Given that this was supposed to be Masters Week, ESPN is showing several famous final rounds Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday -- Wednesday focusing on Jack Nicklaus, as they not only are showing his 1986 victory, they are also showing the 2018 Par 3 Contest.  I just forget if that one is HIM holing out for the first time, or his grandson on 9 (which Nicklaus actually, with all sincerity, calls his proudest moment at Augusta!).  My anonymous friend has reminded me it was Gary, his grandson's.  2018 Par 3 airs 10:30 AM Pacific tomorrow.
• An intrepid bunch of baseball fans are doing a simulation on MLB: The Show of the entire 2020 season, as close to the schedule as circumstances allow.  And all monies raised through subs and the like are going to Meals on Wheels.  It's MLBBotBall, on Twitch and on their own website.
• Olbermann: 

Tonight’s #Thurbercast featured two really good stories: “Other Alarms At Night” and “Mr. Preble Gets Rid Of His Wife.”

The 18th edition of our nightly live I-Read-Aloud-To-You. Enjoy!https://t.co/9yXA4QJfue

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 8, 2020

Day 26, and there's some want for life at the end of the tunnel...

• South Korea is beginning to play baseball...

South Korea has done as good a job as any country of containing coronavirus -- and now, baseball is being played there, with opening day slated for late April. At ESPN, a look inside how Korea is doing it, through the eyes of Americans playing ball there: https://t.co/Q8yeskkqmJ pic.twitter.com/QyGEs35vMg

— Jeff Passan (@JeffPassan) April 6, 2020

• The golf schedule has been announced.  No (British) Open Championship this year.  

1. Planned restart is in June with the Memorial Championship.
2. PGA Championship, August 6-9 in San Francisco.
3. US Open, Sept. 17-20 at Winged Foot.
4. Ryder Cup, Sept. 22-27 at Whistling Straits in Wisconsin.
5. Masters, Nov. 12-15.

• It will be the first time in 75 years (World War II) that the British Open is not contested.

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Stuff to do:

• The European Speedrunners' Association is raising money to try to keep itself afloat with the increased costs of trying to put on events remotely for a week of speedruns from home:  ESA Together. 
• Down the road a bit:  Lady Gaga is putting together a television "at-home concert" event for April 18th -- it will air on all three original major networks and include stars like Paul McCartney, Stevie Wonder, Elton John, and many others.  (USA Today) 
• Baseball Digest has opened it's archives for free for the balance of the emergency. 
• Olbermann:

It’s tonight’s twitter #Thurbercast with “My 10 Rules For A Happy Marriage,” “I Believe,” and the fable “Two Dogs.”

Enjoy!https://t.co/79d83RS4eg

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 7, 2020

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And more evidence of intentional governmental malfeasance:

• Here's a sailor's reaction to the Secretary of the Navy firing Capt. Brett Crozier:

Here is @SECNAV allegedly saying #CaptainCrozier is"too naïve or too stupid to command a ship,” and a sailors response upon hearing the SecNav. pic.twitter.com/DN1mExrXAc

— Naveed Jamali (@NaveedAJamali) April 6, 2020

The Secretary of the Navy has just invited a mutiny aboard one of his ships.  And there's part of me hoping he gets it.

• He has since (probably fake) apologized.

Day 25, kinda late with this...

• Social Distancing Super Bowl VI from Simulated Sports Network is in the books.  (2019 schedules, teams, and stats)

1. AFC Wild Card:  Titans 21 - Jaguars 9, Chiefs 24 - Jets 17 with a last minute touchdown.
2. NFC Wild Card:  Seahawks 21 - Saints 17, Lions 37 - Cowboys 35
3. AFC Divisional:  Patriots 35 - Titans 10, Browns 59 - Chiefs 14 (the simulation made it up, I didn't!!!)
4. NFC Divisional:  Rams 42 - Seahawks 24, Vikings 55 - Lions 10
5. AFC Championship:  Cleveland Browns (13-3) 20 - New England Patriots (10-6) 10  Defense held the Pats to 156 total yards.
6. NFC Championship:  Los Angeles Rams (11-5) 34 - Minnesota Vikings (14-2) 17
7. And Social Distancing Super Bowl VI:  Rams win the title, 42-17.  (Kinda shows how those injuries in the other 2019 season simulated in the NFC title game made that game non-competitive.)

• So now they're mixing things up.  1991, but the rosters are shuffled! 
• A number of pro wrestlers have started taking to Twitch.  Leva Bates, Xavier Woods, Paige among them.
• Olbermann:

Here is #Thurbercast #16 tonight including “Friend Of The Earth” - with parts acted out by my dog Ted - and “Meet Birdey Doggett”https://t.co/1mdH1aUrOK

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 6, 2020

Day 24

• ESPN becomes E-Sports PN -- 12 hours of E-Sports, including Madden, Rocket League, F1 drivers driving simulations, and more of the NBA Casino Simulator Tournament.
• 4 PM (Pacific) tonight, as previously mentioned, online comedy fest.
• In another example of growing pessimism over the situation:  A conference call with the Commissioners of all the major sports leagues and a good number of minor ones now says sports in front of fans can't happen until at least August or September -- and even THAT is seen unrealistic.  Getting an increasing vibe we're fucked.
• Wrestlemania Night One and Chris Jericho's second Saturday Night Special tonight.
• We lost Tom Dempsey to the coronavirus tonight.
• Olbermann:

The 15th #Thurbercast is highlighted by his spectacular story of the snake oil salesman “Doc Marlowe” and the real story behind it (plus Ted barks down the house again)https://t.co/67Kw1qtnj7

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 5, 2020

Day 23, and the pessimism of the situation is beginning to fall in...

• Kevin Durant's manager says the NBA probably isn't restarting.
• The Belgian soccer league is done for the season.
• So are California schools, calling off the remainder of the school year yesterday.

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Stuff to do:

• That special NBA 2K tournament is on ESPN and ESPN2 tonight.
• With Wrestlemania this weekend, ESPN is overloading on the Brock Lesnar Sunday before Night 2:  From his days in Minnesota to the days in the UFC to Wrestlemania 35. 
• The next big ESPN bracket:  2nd Chance World Series.
• Olbermann:

https://t.co/iLsDjiepho

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 4, 2020

Couple of other things for the weekend:

• If you took advantage of a WWE Network offer, what will pass for Wrestlemania this year is two nights, Saturday and Sunday at 7 Eastern.
• Chris Jericho, at 9 Eastern, will do another Saturday Night Special on Facebook Live.  Not sure how much wrestling/Wrestlemania will be covered.
• Adam Sandler, David Spade, Bob Saget, and Ray Romano headline an online from-home comedy festival, Comedy Gives Back Laugh Aid for comics who need the money and can't get gigs due to the coronavirus shutdowns, tomorrow at 4 Pacific just about any way you can get it (AXS TV will handle the TV end, but basically all social media streaming platforms will have it.)

Olbermann and any other Day 22 stuff...

https://t.co/oWFTY39Z1j

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 3, 2020

FUCK YOU BALLHOG! If you're a dumb enough schmuch to think ESPN didn't rig this for him...

Yep, Ballhog "beat" Bird -- and half of ESPN's front page being about Jordan probably didn't hurt matters in that respect.

Of course, Magic ain't buying it!!!

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar/Lew Alcindor is decisively the undisputed GOAT of college basketball! During his 3 years at UCLA he led the Bruins to an 88-2 record, won 3 National Championships, was 3X National College Player of the Year, AND was 3X NCAA Final Four Most Outstanding Player. pic.twitter.com/94QzdU6N0V

— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) April 1, 2020

Because of Lew’s dominance, the NCAA changed the rules and banned dunking in college basketball. From that he created his famous sky hook!

— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) April 1, 2020

Kareem's response:

Hey Earvin - I would have to agree as my college years were incredible but playing for The Lakers and having you as my teammate was a G.O.A.T friendship. https://t.co/aae381ixUX

— Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (@kaj33) April 1, 2020

Day 21 Stuff to Do and Updates -- starting with a PSA a lot of people need to hear!!!

Larry David to the "idiots" that aren't following stay-at-home orders:

"You’re passing up a fantastic opportunity, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, to stay in the house, sit on the couch, and watch TV!"https://t.co/NMEyopcYl9 pic.twitter.com/hQHKCpxvQb

— The Comeback (@thecomeback) April 1, 2020

And Samuel L Jackson is awesome:

Samuel L. Jackson with tonight's perfect bedtime story. pic.twitter.com/CIg0H64c25

— Amee Vanderpool (@girlsreallyrule) April 1, 2020

And, of course, another night of Olbermann:

Here’s tonight’s #Thurbercast wherein I read the great works of James Thurber aloud to you. Tonight’s headliner: “The Macbeth Murder Mystery.”https://t.co/fd4joEOukK

— Keith Olbermann (@KeithOlbermann) April 2, 2020

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Updates:

• Champions League and Europa League and Euro 2020 now suspended indefinitely.  It was hoped they could get it done by the end of player contracts in June.
• MLB has cancelled plans for a 2020 London Series.
• Ohio State is now online-only through the SUMMER term. 
• And, as applies in the periodic nature of my reporting, I have word from the Simulated Sports Network on Social Distancing Super Bowl V:

1. AFC Divisionals: Kansas City over New England and Baltimore over the Jets.
2. NFC Divisionals: Green Bay over Minnesota and Philadelphia over San Francisco
3. AFC Championship:  Baltimore (14-2) over Kansas City (12-4) 28-24
4. NFC Championship:  Green Bay (15-1) over Philadelphia (14-2) 26-20
5. Social Distancing Super Bowl V:  And the Green Bay Packers are going to be...  World Champions!  Super Bowl and NFL MVP (5262 yards passing during the regular season) Aaron Rodgers threw for four touchdowns and the Packers beat the Ravens 38-27 in a replay of the 2013 NFL season. 

For reference, in real life:  Denver beat New England, Seattle beat San Francisco and then wiped the floor with Denver 43-8 in Super Bowl XLVIII.

• New season has started.  Six minute quarters, and last year's rosters again.

• Crap.  Found out about this too late:  CBS had an hour in-home studio with Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood!

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And this one gets a little bit north of "I Gotta Do This."

We start with one of the most unusual ads for this year's Wrestlemania.  Obviously, this was at least shot before all the coronavirus chaos and all that stuff, but the dates reflect the change to the current situation.  This is a South African PPV commercial for the event.

Can't embed the video, because it's only on Reddit, but here's the Reddit post, go watch the video and come back.

The woman in the video is South African rapper-performer Sho Madjozi.  Last year, she released "John Cena" as a multi-lingual single in South Africa, and received so much acclaim and viral attention, she was asked to come to America and "The Kelly Clarkson Show" to perform it!

She said she had never met Cena before, and, well, if you know Cena, you know the rest: