What the fuck are you DOING, ESPN???

So, at the behest of my anonymous friend, I pop on to ESPN.com for a moment.

Sunday night game...
Les Miles fired...
THEN Jose Fernandez' death (which NEVER became the top story on the website all day, and certainly wouldn't now -- let me finish and you'll see why...)
THEN Vin Scully's last home game, punctuated with a division-winning walk-off home run!
Football...
Football...
Football...

And that's the headlines on the front page as of 6:42 PM PDT.

And then, just as I'm typing this..  (Literally just as I'm typing this, I had checked seconds before and got that list!) NOW...  An hour and 15 minutes or so after most other sites confirmed it...

You finally have the time to tell us Arnold Palmer passed away today.

There are people whom, under no circumstances, want me to use your service as a source when the news merits it.

THIS IS WHY, FOUR-LETTERED NETWORK...