I still intend to do that misogyny article -- I've shown parts of it to some friends, and I was told by one of them that the stupidity might keep dragging it back.
That friend was correct.
Ladies and gentlemen, Brendan Shanahan has a problem.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have our next Todd Bertuzzi incident.
As you might recall, Todd Bertuzzi ended the career of Steve Moore with a bulldog to the ice in 2004.
After a first-period fight, Bertuzzi targetted Moore late in a lopsided game.
This was before the league really went "Player Safety" and shots to the head. Even at this point, Bertuzzi was banned from hockey (not just from the NHL, but the international federation as well) for 17 months.
We've got another one.
After a hard check in the first period by Pittsburgh's Brooks Orpik, this happens...
During a post-play scuffle, Shawn Thornton of the Bruins takes Orpik, jumps him, pushes him backward and forces his head into the ice. He then pummels him with several punches, and it appears a possible knee as well to his head.
It's not even known at this point whether Thornton didn't leave the bench to do this.
Start with the Cliffhanger Index: JAX-CLE ((JAX TD pass 40 seconds left), MIN-CHI (FG in overtime), ATL-BUF (FG in overtime)
So 3 this week out of the 16. Total: 42 out of 192. A bit down from the usual one out of four.
Within one score: The above, plus DAL-OAK (the teams traded field goals in the last two minutes, the winning score basically started the 4th quarter), PIT-BAL (Pittsburgh scored with 1:03 left, but they lost 22-20 when the two-point conversion failed), IND-TEN (An Indianapolis touchdown with 1:56 left made the margin eight points, within one score, but not the Tuohy Cliffhanger), PHI-ARI, NE-HOU (Gostkowski's second 53 yarder of the 4th quarter was the difference, 3:12 left), DEN-KC, CIN-SD, NYG-WAS (FG put the Giants up 7 with 2:32 to go)
10 out of the 16 games finished with a margin of eight points or less. Total for the season: 102 out of 192. Roughly 53% of all NFL games end with a margin of one score.
The scoring itself:
Week 13 average: 45.5 -- about four points up from last year.
13 week per game average: 46.36 -- now about two-thirds of a point higher than last year.
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And now, for the "miscreants, riffraff, and losers" of the NFL week. It's time for our Friday Fine Blotter.
How many multiple offenders this week, Mr. Goodell?
Detroit Lions: DeAndre Levy: $15,750 for a headshot.
Detroit Lions: Glover Quin: $7,875 for a late hit.
Detroit Lions #3: Kris Durham: $7,875 for a face mask.
Green Bay Packers: Clay Mathews is, once again, a TWO-TIME LOSER. Let's see if he gets his third letter of the year reduced. This one cost him $15,750 for striking a defenseless player with his helmet.
Green Bay Packers seem to be big losers on the week, not only on the scoreboard: Tramon Williams got dinged $26,250 for shoving a referee. Somebody on the officiating team needs to be downgraded, though. Williams WAS NOT tossed from the game for something that should've been automatic in that regard. Williams should've been suspended, not only for that incident, but he kicked another player in the Lions game -- not fined for that one.
That game alone, with the $31,500 for the Lions, pocketed the league $105,000!! Seriously, Roger... You're going to continue to have that Thanksgiving game with the Packers and Lions, and you can just bet you're going to get dirty bullshit -- from both teams.
Atlanta Falcons: Sean Weatherspoon: $15,750 for roughing the passer.
Minnesota Vikings: Chris Cook: $26,250 for contact with the official. Unlike the Williams incident, Cook WAS tossed. You touch a ref, that's the thumb. Baseball, that's an automatic SUSPENSION (on top of the thumb if he hadn't given it already).
Minnesota Vikings: Rhett Ellison: $7,875 for a face mask.
Seattle Seahawks: Richard Sherman: $7,875 for unnecessary roughness.
Tennessee Titans: Moise Fokou: $7,875 for unnecessary roughness. This makes him a TWO-TIME LOSER.
As a result:
Atlanta Falcons: Level 2. $50,000 more.
There are now no more teams without an NFL fine this year. The Vikings were the last ones I found.
Team Fines For Level 3: Detroit, another $31,500 for the team. (Total for the Lions this year, $511,500. Hey, Goodell, want to talk about docking draft picks?? How about suspending their coach??? NAH, we can't have any of that.)
Tennessee tacks on another $7,875, becoming the third NFL team to go over $400,000 for Player Safety.
Total for the year, at least as of known: $3,675,050.
So how long before we charge the victim in this case, justified or otherwise?
I'm going to have an article up, probably tonight, about how we've made rape and sexual assault part of sports, through the open misogyny of a sportscaster in my old hometown of San Francisco.
Today, they just gave Jameis Winston the Heisman. They won't charge him.
I guess Tallahassee is too much a football town, right?
So the question now has to be what revenge is going to be exacted on the victim in this case? At minimum, she's probably persona non grata in Jacksonville.
Could she be Stubenvilled too?
The football machine in this country had better hope they've got evidence that this is all a falsehood -- the whole damn thing.
Pittsburgh Steelers: Mike Tomlin, fined $100,000 for that stunt. Draft picks are probably going to be pulled.
I want one question on this: If they're going draft picks on this, then why the Hell is Mike Tomlin allowed any football activities, for, AT MINIMUM, the rest of the season?
Draft picks is the next step UP from suspensions. I get the seriousness of it -- I get the knowledge the league knows that Tomlin is a fucking liar on this.
Mike Tomlin should be fired for this, by the league. We're talking, probably, the equivalent of a show-cause at this point (a period in which the NCAA can impose a de facto ban by forcing any school who wishes to hire someone to show cause as to why).
I have no problem with draft picks, as long as Tomlin is banned for the balance of the season (and if they want to tack on a meeting before which he can be reinstated -- and toss his ass from the Rules Committee too...).
The more I look at this, the more I think of that idiot from the Arena Football League playoffs a couple years back.
I mean, think about it this way: Seattle vs. New England in the Super Bowl. What stops either coach from basically paying that $100K and a draft pick or two to "accidentally" ensure their team wins?
Biggest one this week was one the NFL admitted was a mistake.
Sunday night, nearing the end of the game, 2 minutes to go, Washington has the ball, driving on the Giants to try to tie the game, trailing 24-17.
Here's the controversy:
You see, clearly, that the ball is set short of the first down (there are some reports that, in fact, the play actually gained a couple of feet more than this, and it was easily a first down).
The linesman on the near side of the field at :03 - :04 believes so too and motions for the chains to be moved.
The referee is signalling third down.
Now, in any realistic event, the ball cannot be snapped, in any capacity, with this kind of confusion. The league said, correctly, the game had to be stopped to clear the confusion.
As a result, and as the ESPN announcer correctly notes, Mike Shanahan calls a first-down pass play on what turns out to be third down.
It is broken up, the Redskins fail to make 4th down and a foot, and the Giants win 24-17.
So the league admits their error, but you have no recourse to correct it (neener neener neener).
So what does this mean?
Just like almost every other example of admitted bad calls on the part of the league, this was no accident.
The call was NOT a mistake -- in that it ensured the outcome the league openly wanted.
Don't believe me? Here are some examples:
The infamous debacle at Candlestick in the playoffs between the Giants and the 49ers. Botched field-goal snap turns into a mess at the end, with an receiver (who, in fact, was lined up on the end of the field goal unit, and, hence, even with the number, ELIGIBLE) mugged in the attempt to recover the situation. Result? 49ers win, 49er Empire happy, league happy with continued fellating of the 49er dynasty. Error admitted, but nothing can be done.
The Fail Mary. Perhaps, knowing what we know now, this was the establishment of the dirty Seahags being pushed to high Heaven, even with a questionable coach and even more questionable practices behind the scenes (drugs, drugs, drugs...), etc. and so on and the Cult of the 12th Man and so forth... But again, league admits error, but the result stands -- the result (for whatever reason -- be it to get the replacement refs out of there alive or the beginning of the Seahag Era/end of the Packer Era, etc.)
Two errors admitted in a mid-November week last year -- one giving Denver a touchdown it shouldn't have gotten versus Carolina (and probably costing the then-Carolina special-teams coach his job), and a problem in the drawn game between San Francisco and St. Louis.
Super Bowl XL, and one of the worst-officiated games in history. But the balance of the calls aided the Steelers in having hometown boy Jerome Bettis ride off into retirement with a ring.
And there are numerous others.
But, to a one, there's one thing in common.
When the NFL admits a mistake, it's not a mistake. The error ensured the exact result the NFL wanted.
I always knew this whole Alabama-Auburn thing was fucked up long before this weekend, but what has transpired since that crazy field goal return has gotten this rivalry back up near the top of The Stupid.
Not only has the Alabama kicker (the regular one, who missed three other field goals in the game) been the subject of the now-obligatory death threats on Twitter...
28 year-old Adrian Briskey is in jail with $75,000 bond for shooting and killing Shepherd.
As many Alabamans did on Saturday, Briskey and Shepherd attended a party for the Iron Bowl.
After Auburn won, according to a conglomerate blog of three Alabama newspapers, Shepherd and her sister were talking about that they would have been more concerned had the Miami Heat lost -- in that Shepherd was more of a Miami Heat fan than a Crimson Tide fan.
Now, often this is said colloquially, but there's no joke here: That act turned out to be a capital offense, as Briskey scuffled with Shepherd, both ended up on the ground, and Briskey pulled out a handgun and executed Shepherd.
For WHAT?? Not bowing your entire life, fortune, and sacred honor to Alabama football?
I mean, OK... I can take issue with the Miami Heat and all, but parse this out for me...
After having it declared "they don't care about Alabama [football]", a bunch of people at the party block the sisters' exit. No words are exchanged between Briskey and Shepherd. When it's all said and done, Briskey shoots and kills Shepherd for not being a big enough Alabama fan and probably feeling homicidal over the loss.
We've hit full soccer hooligan here, ladies and gentlemen. Wrong colors? Get your ass kicked. Don't swear fealty to the team? DIE!!!
But one of the key things that helps make the script of pro wrestling work is a referee who is utterly blind, deaf, and//or dumb that anything can go on around him and it wouldn't matter.
Have we reached this point in US professional sports?
Sounds like we have. Ask Pittsburgh Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin.
Someone explain to me why not only was no flag thrown, but Tomlin wasn't penalized a Baltimore touchdown and then ejected from the sideline for that.
How is that different from the Jets coach a couple years back? You can clearly see the returner almost having to stiff-arm Tomlin on the way through giving time for #28 to tackle him for the Steelers.
And then all the announcers start giggling over it like little schoolchildren once they realize (and it took a couple looks) how badly he got one over on the refs and the Ravens.
And THEN the erstwhile shill for the official meme league official that placates these kinds of controversies had the gall to say the following:
Now we find out that the referee for the game was Clete Blakeman, the same official who led the crew that "missed" the pass interference on the Panthers vs. the Patriots.
And there is why this kind of stuff happens. You have competent officiating, it's harder to cover for what the league really wants to happen -- closer games, the "right teams and players" winning, etc. and so forth.
And it's not just the Neanderthal Felon League.
Shall we go back to earlier this week, and the Jason Kidd Experiment in how to get an extra time out...
Brooklyn Nets coach Jason Kidd has no time outs left against the Lakers.
All of a sudden, he spills his drink, forcing a stoppage. And, under NBA rules, his team is allowed to gather around the assistant to draw up a play.
Doesn't work (LA wins 99-94), and he's fined $50,000 for the maneuver.
Are we at the point that enough people are wise that the referees in professional sports are either so incompetent or so crooked that:
a) they have no business out there, and
b) that all sense of Fair Play has gone out the window.
